Finding them a little too late

I realise that I am always a little too late. Too late for what, you may ask. Too late for relationships to be developed. Not mere acquaintance, but real deep relationships. I have often known someone for a long long time, but it is only very much later that we discover, or I discover, that we can be really close friends, only to find that we have to go our separate ways already.

It happened in primary school. My best friend in primary school happened to be a guy. We were in the same class since Standard One, but we never became close friends until we reached Standard Five, only to find that we will be going to different schools in different countries in two years' time. Out of my six years in primary school, four years were spent in solitude. Although we still keep in contact, it is not the same.

It happened in secondary school. My best friend in secondary school is probably my bestest friend ever. We were in the same pathetically small school since Form One, and we both served in the Prefectorial Board since Form One. Yet, I did not know of her existence till we were in the same class in Form Three, and we were not even close then. It was in Form Four that we became really close. Now I think she is the person who knows me best besides my Mom. And I wonder why I have not found her earlier. Because when we were in Form Five, we were both lamenting how very short a time we spent together. So we ended up talking on the phone for hours after leaving secondary school.

It happened in college. Hannah was in Bible Knowledge (henceforth to be known as BK) class with me for two years. Besides knowing her by face, I know virtually next to nothing about her. We never even spoke to each other. Then I found her to be in my second semester Law class in college. Only then we became close friends, and she became my self-appointed body guard. It was her last semester, and the time we spent together lasted for less than six months. Then there was Kit Yan, who was also in the same BK class with me for two years. All I knew about her was that she was a high scorer in BK. Only when she came to MCKL, we became really close friends and we became each other's spiritual support. And I wonder why it did not occur to me to get to know them earlier.

It happened in church. I knew Jonathan since we were babies, I think. And we did not even say more than 'Hi!' and 'Bye!' for the first seventeen years of my life. It is only recently that we became good friends as we serve in youth and it is indeed a joy to have someone like him as a friend. Only I wish we could be acquainted earlier. Then there are the Lohs (Miss, Mr and Mrs Loh) who has been in KLBCC for more than five years. We even served together in the worship ministry for quite some time. Yet I did not know them well till recently, only to realise what blessings I've missed out all these years, and the privilege of being called someone's princess. Unfortunately, I may be leaving next year.

And I wonder why am I always a little too late in realising the blessings in disguise that are scattered all around me. Perhaps I need some help in finding them. Perhaps my vision is not so good and I need some aid in locating these little jewels in my life. Perhaps I need a dose of discernment to identify the ones who are my true friends, so that I do not mistake the fake ones as true friends, and miss out the genuine ones. Perhaps I need to be constantly on the lookout.