As the clock ticks, it seems as though it is ticking ever so slowly. I was told that there is joy in waiting. Because the best is still yet to come. Because what lies ahead is far better than what is. Because there is also joy and excitement to be discovered in this period of anticipation. Above all, because the subject of all my anticipation is definitely worth anticipating!
Of course, this is easier said than done, as in most cases. Seeing others having found and was found sure makes me wonder when will it be my turn, or will it ever....
Then other questions keep pouring in. What if I stumble upon one? What will I do? Wait a minute... how do I know the right one in the first place? Because I, for one, do not believe in casualness. It's all or nothing!
Yet, there is a part of me hidden deep within that secretly longs for momentary satisfaction. Even just a spark of the moment will be sufficient.
Then I turn around and condemn myself for the folly of being overcome by a passion of the moment.
I guess the time will come... someday. As the clock continues to tick, there is nothing much to be done, since there is no way to make it tick faster. I can sure adjust the clock by screwing the back of it, but then, that would be cheating. Worse still, I would have been cheating myself! How totally absurd that will be...
So, I guess, this is the time of patient anticipation, of fervent and wise prayers and of much needed growth.
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Thursday, December 27, 2007
What the ads are telling us....
Every single one of the mainstream media is bombarding us with advertisements of all sorts, promoting all kinds of products and services, while at the same time promoting certain values. I can't help but to notice some very interesting advertisements that really caught my attention.
On radio: Guy coughing. "Why are you coughing so badly?" says a friend. "Yea, I've had some late nights entertaining clients in pubs. Can't help it. It's for my business," was the reply. Then the friend said, "You know, smoking and drinking is not good for your health, especially your liver. You should take Thompson Liverin. It's good for your liver."
And the message, my friends, is this: It is OK to smoke and drink. It is part of the world today. Just remember to take Thompson Liverin. I was wondering, if it is really so good, why are so many still dying of liver cancer?
On TV: Guy 'captures' the beauty of his wife with his hand and places it to his heart. He repeats this gesture in a number of scenarios. The secret of her beauty is Fair and Lovely, a facial care product. Then one day, the couple argues and the wife hides in the bedroom and starts crying. She pushes the facial cream away. Husband walks in, sees her beautiful face in the mirror, and once again gestures to capture her beauty. Wife smiles, holds the facial cream in her hands, and the couple reconciles.
And this advertisement, my friends, is saying that, a relationship is built mainly on outward appearance. It is important to look nice, because this will help you solve your marital problems. Of course, I wonder why are there so many wrecked marriages. Maybe she didn't use Fair and Lovely. Oh, but what happens when she turns fifty? Maybe they'll file a divorce then.
On TV: Some kids are drawing and playing tic-tac-toe on the wall. Mother smiles at a distance and says that it is alright. Why? Because she uses a paint the surface of which can be easily cleaned. So after the kids left, she walks over and gently wipes away the crayon marks.
So, it's okay to pick up a pen to scribble and draw and write on anywhere you like, so long as the surface is painted with that paint. Unfortunately, kids cannot differentiate such surfaces, and they thought that they can paint on wherever and whatever they like. As they grow older, they pick up cans of spray paints and spray graffiti all over the place, on walls along the streets, on private properties and on public amenities.
On TV: Girl who uses Head n Shoulder snuggles up close to a boy who sits next to her in the bus. Boy turns over, sees her head almost on his shoulder but does not mind. Because she uses Head n Shoulder. So, her scalp is dandruff-free.
Boys and girls, it's okay to flirt with a person of the opposite gender who is not even known to you. Well, just remember to use Head n Shoulder to make sure your scalp is dandruff-free, or the guy/ girl will flee from you. It is no wonder why there are so many pre-marital pregnancies nowadays!
I would like to go on, but I'm just afraid that this post will be a never-ending one. There are just so many advertisements today promoting 'values' that are not coherent to our culture and our values. Too many, in fact, are preaching the message that it is alright to do this and that it is okay to do that as long as you have our products, without even considering the effects these messages are having on the youngsters of today and the impact they have on our society as a whole. And our censorship board is busy fretting over movies like The Passion of Christ and Amazing Grace because they are 'too religious'. Well, thanks to what the media is propagating, our society has become what it is today!
On radio: Guy coughing. "Why are you coughing so badly?" says a friend. "Yea, I've had some late nights entertaining clients in pubs. Can't help it. It's for my business," was the reply. Then the friend said, "You know, smoking and drinking is not good for your health, especially your liver. You should take Thompson Liverin. It's good for your liver."
And the message, my friends, is this: It is OK to smoke and drink. It is part of the world today. Just remember to take Thompson Liverin. I was wondering, if it is really so good, why are so many still dying of liver cancer?
On TV: Guy 'captures' the beauty of his wife with his hand and places it to his heart. He repeats this gesture in a number of scenarios. The secret of her beauty is Fair and Lovely, a facial care product. Then one day, the couple argues and the wife hides in the bedroom and starts crying. She pushes the facial cream away. Husband walks in, sees her beautiful face in the mirror, and once again gestures to capture her beauty. Wife smiles, holds the facial cream in her hands, and the couple reconciles.
And this advertisement, my friends, is saying that, a relationship is built mainly on outward appearance. It is important to look nice, because this will help you solve your marital problems. Of course, I wonder why are there so many wrecked marriages. Maybe she didn't use Fair and Lovely. Oh, but what happens when she turns fifty? Maybe they'll file a divorce then.
On TV: Some kids are drawing and playing tic-tac-toe on the wall. Mother smiles at a distance and says that it is alright. Why? Because she uses a paint the surface of which can be easily cleaned. So after the kids left, she walks over and gently wipes away the crayon marks.
So, it's okay to pick up a pen to scribble and draw and write on anywhere you like, so long as the surface is painted with that paint. Unfortunately, kids cannot differentiate such surfaces, and they thought that they can paint on wherever and whatever they like. As they grow older, they pick up cans of spray paints and spray graffiti all over the place, on walls along the streets, on private properties and on public amenities.
On TV: Girl who uses Head n Shoulder snuggles up close to a boy who sits next to her in the bus. Boy turns over, sees her head almost on his shoulder but does not mind. Because she uses Head n Shoulder. So, her scalp is dandruff-free.
Boys and girls, it's okay to flirt with a person of the opposite gender who is not even known to you. Well, just remember to use Head n Shoulder to make sure your scalp is dandruff-free, or the guy/ girl will flee from you. It is no wonder why there are so many pre-marital pregnancies nowadays!
I would like to go on, but I'm just afraid that this post will be a never-ending one. There are just so many advertisements today promoting 'values' that are not coherent to our culture and our values. Too many, in fact, are preaching the message that it is alright to do this and that it is okay to do that as long as you have our products, without even considering the effects these messages are having on the youngsters of today and the impact they have on our society as a whole. And our censorship board is busy fretting over movies like The Passion of Christ and Amazing Grace because they are 'too religious'. Well, thanks to what the media is propagating, our society has become what it is today!
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Eventful December
If I were to attempt to blog about every single thing that has happened this December in this post, my post will most probably be as long as the Great Wall of China. Hence, I shall not attempt so. However, I definitely can't wait to share all that has happened in this short and amazing month. I may probably do so in a number of posts... or not.
Let's begin with a checklist of all that has taken place in December 2007:
Let's begin with a checklist of all that has taken place in December 2007:
College... check
Homework... check
LIFE Game Camp... check
Ipoh... check
Hospital... check
Funeral service... check
Memorial service... check
Christmas party... check
Christmas countdown... check
New friends... check
Admission offers... check
Laughter... check
Tears... check
Frustration... check
Dates.... unchecked
Okay, fourteen out of fifteen ain't bad!!
Friday, November 30, 2007
holidays!... or holidays?
I am officially on holiday! Well, 'officially' does not always mean 'actually'. And in this case, it certainly does not. There are so many things lined up for my holiday... Let's see....
- do one essay per day for Law
- attend extra classes for Literature (that means having to go back to college)
- study for Literature Unit 4 exam in January
- study for Economics resit papers in January
- Christmas (= presentations and events)
- Life Game Camp
Some holiday, huh? One thing's for sure, though: it's gonna be 'action-packed'!
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Blessing from Above
This was caught on candid camera!
How lovely and pensive she looks! I've always wanted a sister, but God gave me two brothers instead. However, my God, who is an awesome God, has blessed me with a wonderful cousin. I sure do love her... a lot!!
Sunday, November 25, 2007
interesting!
"Ambition.... is a great man's madness,
that is not kept in chains and close-pent rooms,
that is not kept in chains and close-pent rooms,
but in fair lightsome lodgings, and is girt
with the wild noise of prattling visitants
which makes it lunatic beyond all cure."
-Antonio, John Webster's "Duchess of Malfi"
"The misery of us that are born great,
We are forced to woo because none dare woo us"
-Duchess, John Webster's "Duchess of Malfi"
Friday, November 23, 2007
The other side of driving
It was a fine morning when he said, "Come out, Dorcas. I teach you how to change the tyres. This is very different from the old car." As though I knew how to change the tyres of the old car! Anyway, I obediently went out in my pyjamas.
"Don't you want to change into something else? In case you dirty your pyjamas," Mum said. What?! I thought I was just suppose to observe him doing it! You know, be the audience.... I didn't know it's going to be a hands-on training.
First, he showed me how to replace and retrieve the spare tyre. Well, I did not even know where the spare tyre was kept, to begin with. Anyway, he showed me how to do it at first, then he made me do it as well. It was not so difficult after all! You just screw and screw and screw till the thing is tight.....
After that, he taught me how to jack up the car to change the tyres. So he began by showing me where the jack was kept. When one mentions 'jack', the image of a red and white lawn-mower-like thing appears in my mind's eyes. To my surprise, he took out this black and shiny bomb-like thing with a knob in front that really looked more like a bunsen burner. Then he showed me where to place the thing. It was supposed to be placed somewhere under the suspension, I think. Of course, I did not even know what a suspension looked like.
"See that thing over there? You place it right there." I just nodded and replied with an "uh-huh". But to be honest, the whole of the bottom part of the car looks the same to me. After all, the whole thing is black in colour, and I am pretty sure every part is just as dirty.
So finally he got it done and over with, and I had to help keep all the tools, which I was almost certain weighed more than a tonne. And I wonder why no one ever said anything about changing the tyres when I signed up for driving lessons....
It is no wonder why girls find it hard to connect with their dads. I am sure if it were my brother, he would have been so eager to do these things. But me? change the tyres? under this hot sun? You must be kidding.... I always believe that my God is an awesome God. I can't marvel more at His wisdom than when He created Adam and his sons. Who is gonna change the tyres if they do not exist?
"Don't you want to change into something else? In case you dirty your pyjamas," Mum said. What?! I thought I was just suppose to observe him doing it! You know, be the audience.... I didn't know it's going to be a hands-on training.
First, he showed me how to replace and retrieve the spare tyre. Well, I did not even know where the spare tyre was kept, to begin with. Anyway, he showed me how to do it at first, then he made me do it as well. It was not so difficult after all! You just screw and screw and screw till the thing is tight.....
After that, he taught me how to jack up the car to change the tyres. So he began by showing me where the jack was kept. When one mentions 'jack', the image of a red and white lawn-mower-like thing appears in my mind's eyes. To my surprise, he took out this black and shiny bomb-like thing with a knob in front that really looked more like a bunsen burner. Then he showed me where to place the thing. It was supposed to be placed somewhere under the suspension, I think. Of course, I did not even know what a suspension looked like.
"See that thing over there? You place it right there." I just nodded and replied with an "uh-huh". But to be honest, the whole of the bottom part of the car looks the same to me. After all, the whole thing is black in colour, and I am pretty sure every part is just as dirty.
So finally he got it done and over with, and I had to help keep all the tools, which I was almost certain weighed more than a tonne. And I wonder why no one ever said anything about changing the tyres when I signed up for driving lessons....
It is no wonder why girls find it hard to connect with their dads. I am sure if it were my brother, he would have been so eager to do these things. But me? change the tyres? under this hot sun? You must be kidding.... I always believe that my God is an awesome God. I can't marvel more at His wisdom than when He created Adam and his sons. Who is gonna change the tyres if they do not exist?
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Doing it my way!
I found this very cute comic on 'Being Five':
Cute and interesting, isn't it? Sure it is, but it also reminds me of us. Yes, us, as in you and me!
It reminds me of the time when I told God that I was old enough to do things on my own. I told Him that I didn't need His help anymore. And the worst part of the story is not when I made mistakes, the worst part is when I made a mistake and I did not even know that I'd made one. Like Georgie, I wonder why 'there's an upside down number which was not there'.
While it is necessary for us to grow up and be independent, we have to realise that we will never be able to totally do things on our own without the help of anyone. That is why God has said that He will be with us always. He didn't say that He will be with us until we are old enough spiritually, because He knows we will never be old enough to do everything correctly.
It is also the same in the real world. As teens grow older, we have a tendency to deny help and advice. We think we are old enough to do it on our own. Of course, we never think we are not capable of doing certain things, because we do not even know we have made a mistake in the first place. That is why God has placed in our lives long-suffering parents who relentlessly contribute their generous suggestions and advice in every single thing we do. I am sure God has placed them in our lives for a reason.
Mistake-making is an inevitable part of life, which does not fade away with the process of aging. We still make mistakes, just that the mistakes that we make at every stage of our lives differ. It's high time we all learn to ask for help once in a while when things get out of hand!
Cute and interesting, isn't it? Sure it is, but it also reminds me of us. Yes, us, as in you and me!
It reminds me of the time when I told God that I was old enough to do things on my own. I told Him that I didn't need His help anymore. And the worst part of the story is not when I made mistakes, the worst part is when I made a mistake and I did not even know that I'd made one. Like Georgie, I wonder why 'there's an upside down number which was not there'.
While it is necessary for us to grow up and be independent, we have to realise that we will never be able to totally do things on our own without the help of anyone. That is why God has said that He will be with us always. He didn't say that He will be with us until we are old enough spiritually, because He knows we will never be old enough to do everything correctly.
It is also the same in the real world. As teens grow older, we have a tendency to deny help and advice. We think we are old enough to do it on our own. Of course, we never think we are not capable of doing certain things, because we do not even know we have made a mistake in the first place. That is why God has placed in our lives long-suffering parents who relentlessly contribute their generous suggestions and advice in every single thing we do. I am sure God has placed them in our lives for a reason.
Mistake-making is an inevitable part of life, which does not fade away with the process of aging. We still make mistakes, just that the mistakes that we make at every stage of our lives differ. It's high time we all learn to ask for help once in a while when things get out of hand!
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
officially 19
And I've officially turned 19! As I am writing now, I am precisely 19 years, 23 hours and 32 minutes old. I almost cannot believe that I've lived for 19 years. It sounds like such a long time... that's almost 2 decades, you know.
How was my day, you may ask. It was okay.... Nothing exceptional, as I am resigned to the fact that my life is a routine. However, yesterday, I was reminded of just how rich I am.
The very first birthday wish came all the way from Australia (1am Aussie time), from a friend whose birthday I do not even know. Then, at presicely 12 midnight, my best friend's wish came. From then on, my phone never stopped beeping. Even 'someones' (is that the plural for someone?) tried to go against convention and sent in their wishes at precisely 00:00 November 21, so that they will be the very last persons to wish me (and I thought they had forgotten). Well, they succeeded!
Most amazing thing is that my friends back in secondary school were the very first ones to send in their wishes, some of whom whose number I do not even have. How very nice of them to remember me....
See, I am indeed a very rich person, don't you think? Rich, not of worldly richest, but because of the many people around me who cares about me. People whom, at times, I have overlooked...
Man, I feel so special and pampered!!
Oh, and there was this very special gift from the other half of my class.... Maybe one day you guys will get to see it.
How was my day, you may ask. It was okay.... Nothing exceptional, as I am resigned to the fact that my life is a routine. However, yesterday, I was reminded of just how rich I am.
The very first birthday wish came all the way from Australia (1am Aussie time), from a friend whose birthday I do not even know. Then, at presicely 12 midnight, my best friend's wish came. From then on, my phone never stopped beeping. Even 'someones' (is that the plural for someone?) tried to go against convention and sent in their wishes at precisely 00:00 November 21, so that they will be the very last persons to wish me (and I thought they had forgotten). Well, they succeeded!
Most amazing thing is that my friends back in secondary school were the very first ones to send in their wishes, some of whom whose number I do not even have. How very nice of them to remember me....
See, I am indeed a very rich person, don't you think? Rich, not of worldly richest, but because of the many people around me who cares about me. People whom, at times, I have overlooked...
Man, I feel so special and pampered!!
Oh, and there was this very special gift from the other half of my class.... Maybe one day you guys will get to see it.
Monday, November 19, 2007
essays, essays......
And I'm finally done with writing admission essays! 1 or 2 essays for one application and I've submitted five applications. So, you do the math! This answers for the lack of post on my blog lately. And I thought I enjoyed writing and would like to pursue a career in writing.... Well, this admission essay business sure drained all the interest that I have ever had for writing, at least for the moment.
Honestly, how can it not, when you are asked to write a 2-5 page essay describing yourself and your dreams, and another essay indicating a person who has had a significant influence on you. I know myself too well to reduce my 19 years (minus one day) of life on earth into a 2-5 page essay, yet I live a life that is too common and too regular and too routine to fill up 2 to 5 pages with anything that is of any real interest to an outsider. My dreams? Oh well, at the moment, I do not have any plans of leading a revolution or to change the world. My dream is to get married and have some kids so that I can build a family of my own. And this is exactly what I wrote in my essay. (trust me, my right hand is on the Bible) The person who has had the most significant influence in my life? Undoubtedly, that person is Dorcas Lam a.k.a. Lam Yarn Pooi a.k.a. Dorcas Yarn-Pooi Lam a.k.a. me! hands down. I mean, from whom can you learn better life lessons than yourself? After all, you are the only person whose strengths and weaknesses are all known to you. Unfortunately, this did not sound like a very good choice of answer to be written in an admission essay. So, you see my dilemma?
And then, besides the essays, I was also asked to submit short answers to questions like:
1. Why do you choose X University? What do you think is so distinct about this university?
Honestly, how can it not, when you are asked to write a 2-5 page essay describing yourself and your dreams, and another essay indicating a person who has had a significant influence on you. I know myself too well to reduce my 19 years (minus one day) of life on earth into a 2-5 page essay, yet I live a life that is too common and too regular and too routine to fill up 2 to 5 pages with anything that is of any real interest to an outsider. My dreams? Oh well, at the moment, I do not have any plans of leading a revolution or to change the world. My dream is to get married and have some kids so that I can build a family of my own. And this is exactly what I wrote in my essay. (trust me, my right hand is on the Bible) The person who has had the most significant influence in my life? Undoubtedly, that person is Dorcas Lam a.k.a. Lam Yarn Pooi a.k.a. Dorcas Yarn-Pooi Lam a.k.a. me! hands down. I mean, from whom can you learn better life lessons than yourself? After all, you are the only person whose strengths and weaknesses are all known to you. Unfortunately, this did not sound like a very good choice of answer to be written in an admission essay. So, you see my dilemma?
And then, besides the essays, I was also asked to submit short answers to questions like:
1. Why do you choose X University? What do you think is so distinct about this university?
Frankly, I really did not choose the university. But I believe the university will be very distinct to me if it offers me full scholarship, and I will definitely choose the university then.
2. What can you contribute to the community at X University?
What can I contribute? If I am admitted, but not on full scholarship, funds and US Dollars are what I will be contributing.
And just when I thought I am done with admission essays, I am asked to consider applying for the Honors Program, which requires me to write another 6-page essay explaining how I will gain from doing the Honors Program.
Heck, I am not even admitted into the university yet. How am I suppose to know how I will benefit from the program? c'mon...
Saturday, November 17, 2007
Finding them a little too late
I realise that I am always a little too late. Too late for what, you may ask. Too late for relationships to be developed. Not mere acquaintance, but real deep relationships. I have often known someone for a long long time, but it is only very much later that we discover, or I discover, that we can be really close friends, only to find that we have to go our separate ways already.
It happened in primary school. My best friend in primary school happened to be a guy. We were in the same class since Standard One, but we never became close friends until we reached Standard Five, only to find that we will be going to different schools in different countries in two years' time. Out of my six years in primary school, four years were spent in solitude. Although we still keep in contact, it is not the same.
It happened in secondary school. My best friend in secondary school is probably my bestest friend ever. We were in the same pathetically small school since Form One, and we both served in the Prefectorial Board since Form One. Yet, I did not know of her existence till we were in the same class in Form Three, and we were not even close then. It was in Form Four that we became really close. Now I think she is the person who knows me best besides my Mom. And I wonder why I have not found her earlier. Because when we were in Form Five, we were both lamenting how very short a time we spent together. So we ended up talking on the phone for hours after leaving secondary school.
It happened in college. Hannah was in Bible Knowledge (henceforth to be known as BK) class with me for two years. Besides knowing her by face, I know virtually next to nothing about her. We never even spoke to each other. Then I found her to be in my second semester Law class in college. Only then we became close friends, and she became my self-appointed body guard. It was her last semester, and the time we spent together lasted for less than six months. Then there was Kit Yan, who was also in the same BK class with me for two years. All I knew about her was that she was a high scorer in BK. Only when she came to MCKL, we became really close friends and we became each other's spiritual support. And I wonder why it did not occur to me to get to know them earlier.
It happened in church. I knew Jonathan since we were babies, I think. And we did not even say more than 'Hi!' and 'Bye!' for the first seventeen years of my life. It is only recently that we became good friends as we serve in youth and it is indeed a joy to have someone like him as a friend. Only I wish we could be acquainted earlier. Then there are the Lohs (Miss, Mr and Mrs Loh) who has been in KLBCC for more than five years. We even served together in the worship ministry for quite some time. Yet I did not know them well till recently, only to realise what blessings I've missed out all these years, and the privilege of being called someone's princess. Unfortunately, I may be leaving next year.
And I wonder why am I always a little too late in realising the blessings in disguise that are scattered all around me. Perhaps I need some help in finding them. Perhaps my vision is not so good and I need some aid in locating these little jewels in my life. Perhaps I need a dose of discernment to identify the ones who are my true friends, so that I do not mistake the fake ones as true friends, and miss out the genuine ones. Perhaps I need to be constantly on the lookout.
It happened in primary school. My best friend in primary school happened to be a guy. We were in the same class since Standard One, but we never became close friends until we reached Standard Five, only to find that we will be going to different schools in different countries in two years' time. Out of my six years in primary school, four years were spent in solitude. Although we still keep in contact, it is not the same.
It happened in secondary school. My best friend in secondary school is probably my bestest friend ever. We were in the same pathetically small school since Form One, and we both served in the Prefectorial Board since Form One. Yet, I did not know of her existence till we were in the same class in Form Three, and we were not even close then. It was in Form Four that we became really close. Now I think she is the person who knows me best besides my Mom. And I wonder why I have not found her earlier. Because when we were in Form Five, we were both lamenting how very short a time we spent together. So we ended up talking on the phone for hours after leaving secondary school.
It happened in college. Hannah was in Bible Knowledge (henceforth to be known as BK) class with me for two years. Besides knowing her by face, I know virtually next to nothing about her. We never even spoke to each other. Then I found her to be in my second semester Law class in college. Only then we became close friends, and she became my self-appointed body guard. It was her last semester, and the time we spent together lasted for less than six months. Then there was Kit Yan, who was also in the same BK class with me for two years. All I knew about her was that she was a high scorer in BK. Only when she came to MCKL, we became really close friends and we became each other's spiritual support. And I wonder why it did not occur to me to get to know them earlier.
It happened in church. I knew Jonathan since we were babies, I think. And we did not even say more than 'Hi!' and 'Bye!' for the first seventeen years of my life. It is only recently that we became good friends as we serve in youth and it is indeed a joy to have someone like him as a friend. Only I wish we could be acquainted earlier. Then there are the Lohs (Miss, Mr and Mrs Loh) who has been in KLBCC for more than five years. We even served together in the worship ministry for quite some time. Yet I did not know them well till recently, only to realise what blessings I've missed out all these years, and the privilege of being called someone's princess. Unfortunately, I may be leaving next year.
And I wonder why am I always a little too late in realising the blessings in disguise that are scattered all around me. Perhaps I need some help in finding them. Perhaps my vision is not so good and I need some aid in locating these little jewels in my life. Perhaps I need a dose of discernment to identify the ones who are my true friends, so that I do not mistake the fake ones as true friends, and miss out the genuine ones. Perhaps I need to be constantly on the lookout.
Saturday, November 10, 2007
Sweet!
As I was flipping through my diary, I saw these quotes that I had taken down:
"I have not broken your heart- you have broken it; and in breaking it, you have broken mine."
"I forgive what you have done to me. I love my murderer- but yours! How can I?"
-by Heathcliff, Charlotte Bronte's "Wuthering Heights"
Thursday, November 8, 2007
Now I know.....
Now I finally know why in Malaysia we always have long festive holidays. If they are not one-week long, they are at least two or three days long, like the Deepavali holidays this time. Remember the ban for fire crackers? Well, apparently the ban was not very effective (obviously!). So, instead of having a preventive measure, the govenment has sought to using cures. Since people like to play with fire crackers, especially at night after bedtime, the government allows long festive holidays. Just in case people didn't get enough sleep and can't wake up for school and work the next morning, it's okay, cause there will be holidays. Aww.... how nice! But just too unfortunate for people like me who enjoy and cherish a night of peaceful slumber.
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
Sunday's Child
Monday's child is fair of face,
Tuesday's Child is full of grace,
Wednesday's child is full of woe,
Thursday's child has far to go,
Friday's child is loving and giving,
Saturday's child works hard for a living,
But the child that is born on the Sabbath Day is bonny and blithe and good and gay.
November 20, 1988 was a Sunday. Guess that explains a lot, huh? haha......
Monday, November 5, 2007
'The Shawshank Redemption'
It is my exam week, yet within less than 24 hours, I managed to watch the same movie twice on DVD. Well, that really tells how remarkable the movie is! It is indeed one of the best ones I've watched so far. Hands down.... So, ladies and gentleman, presenting to you 'The Shawshank Redemption', starring Tim Robbins and Morgan Freeman.
The movie is set in a prison. It is about a man who was wrongly convicted of murder and was sentenced to life imprisonment, and the things that go on in there really startle you and I. But the thing that thugs at my heart string is the message of friendship and hope that is being brought out. Of all places, it is really ironical that such a message is preached from a prison, where it is known to be a place where no one is your friend. And hope? Sounds to me like the most unlikely thing to be found in a prison.
Anyway, here are a few lines that I would like to quote from the movie:
The movie is set in a prison. It is about a man who was wrongly convicted of murder and was sentenced to life imprisonment, and the things that go on in there really startle you and I. But the thing that thugs at my heart string is the message of friendship and hope that is being brought out. Of all places, it is really ironical that such a message is preached from a prison, where it is known to be a place where no one is your friend. And hope? Sounds to me like the most unlikely thing to be found in a prison.
Anyway, here are a few lines that I would like to quote from the movie:
"There are places in the world that aren't made out of stone.....There's something inside that they can't get to, that they can't touch. It's yours."
It is about hope. Hope is the thing that keeps one alive, and it is the only thing that no one can take away from you. Unfortunately, it is also the thing of which many deprive themselves.
They say that hope is a dangerous thing. It drives a man insane. I say hope is a dangerous thing. Without hope, you have no sanity to be driven away. They say the higher your hope soars, the greater the impact of the subsequent disappointment. I say if your hope does not soar, you will not even live to be disappointed. Hope keeps one alive. While it may be your decision to draw in each breath that is directly keeping you alive, it is hope or hopelessness that brings about that decision.
Here's a wonderful poem on HOPE, by Emily Dickinson:
PART ONE: LIFE, Emily Dickinson
Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tunes without the words,
And never stops at all,
And sweetest is the gale is heard;
And sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm.
I've heard it in the chillest land,
And on the strangest sea;
Yet, never, in extremity,
It asked a crumb of me.
At the very end of the movie, this was shown on the screen: "This movie was nominated for 7 Academy Awards, including the Best Picture. It won none."
Thursday, November 1, 2007
Gentlemanly
It was a long and tiring day. After spending part of my morning in school trying to get certification for my documents, then sneaking out in between classes to post them to US, I still had to make a trip to MACEE in the afternoon. Just as I thought I can hitch a ride back home with Dad, he told me that I had to take the Monorail and LRT home as he did not bring his car that day. *sigh*
So I reached the LRT station, I saw the train leaving before my eyes. So I had to board the next train. It was not crowded (thank God!), but there was no seat left. With my 1-tonne backpack on my shoulders, my jacket hanging from my left arm, and my bottle and a plastic bag of files and documents on my right, I squeezed myself into a corner of the train in an attempt to locate my comfort zone for the short 5 minutes.
Then, he got up and offered me his seat. At the exact moment, the train jerked a little, and we were practically face-to-face. It was a moment of awkwardness. So I quickly nodded and muttered my thank you. As I sat down, I was overwhelmed by a sudden surge of mixed emotions. After all, I had never been offered a seat in the 19 years of my life on earth. Well, I have come to realise two things though:
So I reached the LRT station, I saw the train leaving before my eyes. So I had to board the next train. It was not crowded (thank God!), but there was no seat left. With my 1-tonne backpack on my shoulders, my jacket hanging from my left arm, and my bottle and a plastic bag of files and documents on my right, I squeezed myself into a corner of the train in an attempt to locate my comfort zone for the short 5 minutes.
Then, he got up and offered me his seat. At the exact moment, the train jerked a little, and we were practically face-to-face. It was a moment of awkwardness. So I quickly nodded and muttered my thank you. As I sat down, I was overwhelmed by a sudden surge of mixed emotions. After all, I had never been offered a seat in the 19 years of my life on earth. Well, I have come to realise two things though:
- There are gentlemen still living in the 21st Century! (oops, sorry guys. No offence! It's just a hyperbolical remark!)
- Being offered a seat makes me feel so nice, yet so embarrassed at the same time. (after all, I'm only 19 years old!) Talking about mixed emotions......
Monday, October 22, 2007
What do you want to be?
Ever wondered why Malaysia has never produced any Nobel Prize Laureate? Even Pakistan and Bangladesh have their share of Nobel Prize Laureates. Why not Malaysia? After all, Malaysia is one of the leading developing countries. Besides that, the government is pushing all the cream of the crop into the science stream. Why did they not invent something revolutionary and rake in at least one or two Nobel Prizes for, say Physics and Biology?
Someone once gave me an answer to that question. One can only be successful when he or she has a passion for what he or she is doing. I can't help but to fully agree to the answer. How can one invent anything worth being nominated for the Nobel Prize when getting up for work every morning is such a dread, and life is merely a series of routines? A job, to them, is nothing but a means of staying alive and a stepping stone to achieving their desired lifestyle.
Of course, our education system and the Asian mindset of many of our parents contribute a lot to this social phenomenon. The straight As students must be placed in the science stream, whether or not they have genuine interest in science. The best of the best must go into medicine, as if the country can survive with nobody else but doctors alone. Parents tell their children that they must either take up law or medicine or business administration, then from there they can choose their desired career path. As though they have much of a choice after that. And the end result? Tonnes of students who hate what they are studying. Tonnes of working adults who get up for work every morning for the mere necessity of it.
When I was at the first crossroad of my life (after I finished my SPM), the usual question people asked me was "What are your future plans?" After I told them what I had in mind for my own future, they will gladly contribute their own opinions and suggestions. Are you sure that's what you wanna do? There's no prospect. You will not be able to make a living. Doing what you like is one thing, but you also have to be practical.
I guess it all boils down to your purpose in life: what you want to achieve in life. If you are in a pursuit for material wealth, perhaps the best option is to go for the most profitable career, say lawyer, doctor, or businessman. However, at the end of the day, you will only find that you are too exhausted to enjoy the abundance of wealth you have created for yourself. After all, you work for 30 years to fund the enjoyment in your twilight years that last for only 10 years, that is if you still have the blessing of good health by then. For me, it is the pursuit of fulfillment and self-satisfaction. It is a desire to fulfill my dreams and longings and to live a life on which I can reflect with a smile at my death bed.
Of course, we are always haunted by the practicality question of whether or not we will be able to make a living. Frankly, I think in Malaysia, especially in Kuala Lumpur, staying alive is not a problem; getting rich and living in luxury are. I am certain that whichever career path you take, you will never starve to death by a street. Those who starve are those who are not willing to work at all.
Despite the sceptical comments I receive, I am determined to do what I really enjoy doing. I want to bring about a tide of change and to leave behind my footprints at least, in the course my life. I don't want to be contemplating my retirement at the age of 35. I don't want my life to be a dull set of routines that I despise, a boring series of obligations in which I am trapped and from which I am unable to free myself. So, despite what they say, I am going to do what my heart and my Lord are telling me to do. After all, someone has to do what no one wants to do. Where on earth do you think the pastors, social workers and entertainers come from if everyone decides to be a doctor, a lawyer or a businessman?
What do you want to be in the future? I want to be a wife, a mother, a writer and a servant of God.
Someone once gave me an answer to that question. One can only be successful when he or she has a passion for what he or she is doing. I can't help but to fully agree to the answer. How can one invent anything worth being nominated for the Nobel Prize when getting up for work every morning is such a dread, and life is merely a series of routines? A job, to them, is nothing but a means of staying alive and a stepping stone to achieving their desired lifestyle.
Of course, our education system and the Asian mindset of many of our parents contribute a lot to this social phenomenon. The straight As students must be placed in the science stream, whether or not they have genuine interest in science. The best of the best must go into medicine, as if the country can survive with nobody else but doctors alone. Parents tell their children that they must either take up law or medicine or business administration, then from there they can choose their desired career path. As though they have much of a choice after that. And the end result? Tonnes of students who hate what they are studying. Tonnes of working adults who get up for work every morning for the mere necessity of it.
When I was at the first crossroad of my life (after I finished my SPM), the usual question people asked me was "What are your future plans?" After I told them what I had in mind for my own future, they will gladly contribute their own opinions and suggestions. Are you sure that's what you wanna do? There's no prospect. You will not be able to make a living. Doing what you like is one thing, but you also have to be practical.
I guess it all boils down to your purpose in life: what you want to achieve in life. If you are in a pursuit for material wealth, perhaps the best option is to go for the most profitable career, say lawyer, doctor, or businessman. However, at the end of the day, you will only find that you are too exhausted to enjoy the abundance of wealth you have created for yourself. After all, you work for 30 years to fund the enjoyment in your twilight years that last for only 10 years, that is if you still have the blessing of good health by then. For me, it is the pursuit of fulfillment and self-satisfaction. It is a desire to fulfill my dreams and longings and to live a life on which I can reflect with a smile at my death bed.
Of course, we are always haunted by the practicality question of whether or not we will be able to make a living. Frankly, I think in Malaysia, especially in Kuala Lumpur, staying alive is not a problem; getting rich and living in luxury are. I am certain that whichever career path you take, you will never starve to death by a street. Those who starve are those who are not willing to work at all.
Despite the sceptical comments I receive, I am determined to do what I really enjoy doing. I want to bring about a tide of change and to leave behind my footprints at least, in the course my life. I don't want to be contemplating my retirement at the age of 35. I don't want my life to be a dull set of routines that I despise, a boring series of obligations in which I am trapped and from which I am unable to free myself. So, despite what they say, I am going to do what my heart and my Lord are telling me to do. After all, someone has to do what no one wants to do. Where on earth do you think the pastors, social workers and entertainers come from if everyone decides to be a doctor, a lawyer or a businessman?
What do you want to be in the future? I want to be a wife, a mother, a writer and a servant of God.
Friday, October 19, 2007
The fine line between kindness and foolishness
At times I wonder if values are always contemporary, or like technology, they become obsolete with the passage of time. In moral classes, we are often taught to help the 'poor and needy'. In Bible Knowledge class, we are taught the Law of Love from the Christian perspective as Jesus taught in Luke 6:27-30,
"27 But I say to you that hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. 29 To him who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also; and from him who takes away your coat do not withhold even your short. 30 Give to every one who begs from you; and of him who takes away your goods do not ask them again."
I can't help wondering if these teachings are still applicable today in the 21st century. Will we be treated like fools if we strictly adhere to what we were taught? Will we be taken advantage of because we demonstrate love as we were taught to?
As I walked down Petaling Street, especially from Plaza Rakyat LRT station, the people by the street trying to make a living caught my attention, and my heart went out to them. Many a time I wanted to just show them kindness and Christian love. But the question here is 'How?'. My intention to give them alms was immediately terminated when I saw a packet of cigarettes peeping out of their pockets. If they can afford to purchase cigarettes, wouldn't they be able to afford their meals as well? If I were to give them money just like that, I would be supporting the tobacco industry, wouldn't I? So I intended to help them by giving them food instead. Disappointingly, this intention of mine was also forced to be terminated when I heard that my brother's friend who did the same was scolded by the 'poor lady' for not giving her money instead. Well, so much for demonstrating love and kindness....
There was once, when I was browsing through some books in Borders, I was approached by an old lady who asked me for some money to buy a drink. Not wanting to turn her away empty handed, I sent my brother who was with me to buy her mineral water from 7-Eleven. Guess what? She didn't want mineral water. She wanted Milo! Fine. And she led my brother to the shop that probably sells the most expensive Milo ever and ordered the drink even before my brother reached the shop. It cost him RM 2.80 for one teeny-weeny cup of Milo! For the next few days, he couldn't stop complaining!
I think it was not so much the RM 2.80 that prompted my brother's complaints, but rather the feeling that he was being exploited for his kindness. Hence, it points us back to the question of whether or not Jesus' command for us to show kindness without holding back is still applicable in the 21st Century, when you do not even know if the person who approaches you comes with pure intentions.
Can we still demonstrate love by turning the other cheek when being struck? Or will we be taken advantage of because of the command to demonstrate love? Can we still 'give to all who beg from us'? Does doing so really help the needy, or is the money merely being channelled from our pockets to the pockets of others who are possibly better off than ourselves?
I guess living in the deceptive age of the 21st Century demands a lot of wisdom, discretion and discernment to ensure that our position is not being taken advantage of. After all, kindness and foolishness are merely separated by a very fine line.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Man: Civilised vs Barbarous
As I was doing revision the other day, I came across a very interesting remark in my Unit 4 Literature text, Alias Grace by Margaret Atwood. It says,
"The difference between a civilised man and a barbarous fiend- a madman, say- lies, perhaps merely in a thin veneer of willed self-restraint."
The 'man' in this context, refers not to the humankind, but to the male sex in particular. It was said in the context of sexual desires. The text was previously discussing the sexual inclination of men, and how women became victims of the lust and personal desires of men.
Hence, in plain words, this remark is saying that, what separates and differentiates say, the fiend who tortured little Nurin from the other 'gentlemen' in our society, is that the latter willfully restraints their actions while the former does not and has thereby given in to his lust. In other words, the remark says that what goes through the minds of all guys is the same. The difference lies in whether those fantasies remain in the mind or are they being put into action.
Hmm.... how interesting... I do not know what goes through the male faculty of thoughts and intelligence, but I sure wonder if I will be surprised and shocked by the discovery of what goes through the minds of these people who cross my path every single day. Will it be an epiphany or will it be an anti-climax?
Guys, do leave a comment to shed light on this issue. Girls, feel free to add on or express yourselves.
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Living with the ultimate Choleric
While everyone else was enjoying the Raya holidays, I was stuck in the college. Yes, it's true! Sad, but true... I have only Monday off. Besides not having more holidays, I still had to go back to college on Friday night for CF Leaders' Retreat. We stayed in college for the night and the meeting ended at noon the next day. So there goes half of my holiday!
Well, I really shouldn't complain about it. After all, I am doing the Lord's work. Frankly, the meeting was a much needed one. We really needed to review what the CF had been doing all these while and set goals and some substantial guidelines for the CF. At least, we need to set our purpose right. I can' deny that it was a VERY fruitful meeting, for it was indeed fruitful. We shared our past CF experience (of which I have none) and other stuffs as well. Then we review the purpose and direction of the CF. It was interesting to be reminded again of the purpose of the CF's existence. Then we came out with this 3-page long constitution for the CF. Man, I thought I was in Law class with all the 'articles' and 'amendments'! In the first place, I didn't know CFs need constitutions. Well, it apparently does!
The most interesting thing throughout the 1-day-1-night retreat was having to live with "The Ultimate Choleric". I have never in my life seen anyone with as strong and willful a character as hers. While we were analysing the Great Commission in Matthew 28 as told by Mr. Michael and applying it to the context of our CF, she was all the while telling us what to do and what to write instead of allowing us the free time to brainstorm (which I think is the main purpose of the activity). Before I can have the time to conceive a thought in my mind, she was by my side telling us what we were supposed to do! I had to hint that maybe she 'wanna help the other group instead'. Then all through the meeting, she was asserting her opinion on everyone and telling me what I should be doing. To be very frank, I was annoyed, and my patience was exhausted. Finally, Wen Shan tactfully asked if she had taken the personality test and that if she is a Choleric. Well, everyone knew what that meant, maybe with the exception of herself.
Unfortunately, she shared the same room with the girls, and her love for Scrabble drove her to compel everyone else to join her in the game for the whole night till 1.48am. Goodness me! Everyone was so bored. Some were fiddling with their cameras, some were just chatting, and some were half asleep. Still, she insisted on continuing the game, so much so that she volunteered to do other people's turn! What a game! Finally, someone messed up the point system and the game had to be terminated. Good grief!
Being half a Choleric myself, crossing path with other Cholerics means a clash of personality. But I guess sometimes God puts people like these in my path to refine my patience and train me to accept others just as they are, just as He loves me just as I am. It was also an experience of 'casting crowns': to cast my crown at His feet in exchange for His spirit of humility.There are things to give thanks for, though. At least she is not in my family and I don't have to bear with her for the rest of my life!
Everything said and done, I am reminded that this retreat is really not about her but about the CF. In speaking so, I truly thank God for a very committed committee! (Now I know from where the word 'committee' is derived.) And once again, I am encouraged by the promise in Isaiah 40:28-31. After all, it's His work that I'm doing. I really shouldn't rely on my own strength in doing God's work. How can I?
Well, I really shouldn't complain about it. After all, I am doing the Lord's work. Frankly, the meeting was a much needed one. We really needed to review what the CF had been doing all these while and set goals and some substantial guidelines for the CF. At least, we need to set our purpose right. I can' deny that it was a VERY fruitful meeting, for it was indeed fruitful. We shared our past CF experience (of which I have none) and other stuffs as well. Then we review the purpose and direction of the CF. It was interesting to be reminded again of the purpose of the CF's existence. Then we came out with this 3-page long constitution for the CF. Man, I thought I was in Law class with all the 'articles' and 'amendments'! In the first place, I didn't know CFs need constitutions. Well, it apparently does!
The most interesting thing throughout the 1-day-1-night retreat was having to live with "The Ultimate Choleric". I have never in my life seen anyone with as strong and willful a character as hers. While we were analysing the Great Commission in Matthew 28 as told by Mr. Michael and applying it to the context of our CF, she was all the while telling us what to do and what to write instead of allowing us the free time to brainstorm (which I think is the main purpose of the activity). Before I can have the time to conceive a thought in my mind, she was by my side telling us what we were supposed to do! I had to hint that maybe she 'wanna help the other group instead'. Then all through the meeting, she was asserting her opinion on everyone and telling me what I should be doing. To be very frank, I was annoyed, and my patience was exhausted. Finally, Wen Shan tactfully asked if she had taken the personality test and that if she is a Choleric. Well, everyone knew what that meant, maybe with the exception of herself.
Unfortunately, she shared the same room with the girls, and her love for Scrabble drove her to compel everyone else to join her in the game for the whole night till 1.48am. Goodness me! Everyone was so bored. Some were fiddling with their cameras, some were just chatting, and some were half asleep. Still, she insisted on continuing the game, so much so that she volunteered to do other people's turn! What a game! Finally, someone messed up the point system and the game had to be terminated. Good grief!
Being half a Choleric myself, crossing path with other Cholerics means a clash of personality. But I guess sometimes God puts people like these in my path to refine my patience and train me to accept others just as they are, just as He loves me just as I am. It was also an experience of 'casting crowns': to cast my crown at His feet in exchange for His spirit of humility.There are things to give thanks for, though. At least she is not in my family and I don't have to bear with her for the rest of my life!
Everything said and done, I am reminded that this retreat is really not about her but about the CF. In speaking so, I truly thank God for a very committed committee! (Now I know from where the word 'committee' is derived.) And once again, I am encouraged by the promise in Isaiah 40:28-31. After all, it's His work that I'm doing. I really shouldn't rely on my own strength in doing God's work. How can I?
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Too close for comfort
When were you closest to anyone? I sure would like to think that it is when I'm with my loved ones and friends. Unfortunately, many a time, it is a stranger who shares this closeness. Scratching your head? You'll know what I mean if you are one who frequently takes public transport, especially during peak hours.
Having to take the public transport every week day, I know what it means to be really close to someone. Especially during peak hours like 8am+ and 5pm+, you are forced into the close company of strangers, whether or not you like it, of course, unless you don't mind waiting for a longer period of time for the next train/ bus. Well, as for me, I have neither the luxury of time nor the patience.
The moment the doors slide open, the battle for space begins. Everyone tries to shove and push to secure a spot in the train, however small it may be. As long as they get both their feet beyond the open doors, other parts come in second. Hence, we have the hilarious situations when guys get their backpacks stuck in between the closed doors and the edges of clothing are seen between the doors. I try to be civilised and let others go first, after all, this is what we were taught in moral classes, but somehow, people just don't give way to civility. Those from the back start pushing if you don't make way, and deep inside, I realise that if I don't do the same, I will never get on the train.
Finally, I am in the train, and when the doors close, I realise that I am trapped in a small space with at least more than 50 other strangers. Claustrophobia sets in! Not only so, I find myself in close proximity to these people whom I hardly know. In fact, they are total strangers. Literally! I find my body being dangerously and uncomfortably close to them. Sometimes, our hands touch and, as though there is a current, both hands are drawn apart in a reflex, followed by a muttered apology, as if it is a great sin to be in contact with each other. How ironical that sounds, when you are surrounded by a sea of crowd!
Four more stations to go!
The longer period of time I spend in the train, the more conscious I am of the apparent odour coming from those around me. There are smells of Romance, Curious, Calvin Klein and Hugo. There are smells of mere body odour that makes me wonder when was the last time these people took a long good shower, or perhaps they fell into a drain prior to boarding the train. The mixture of odours turns the sweet smell to unbearably strong stench and the smell of sweat into... well, I shall not proceed.
Three more stations to go!
When the lady in front of me finally decides to remove her baggage from the seat next to her, for which I assume she bought a ticket since they occupy one whole seat or perhaps more, I seize the opportunity and force my bum into the limited space. After having done so, I begin to regret. I realise that the man to my right is eyeing me from top to toe and it really makes me feel awkward and uncomfortable. The woman to my left is carrying a plastic bag from which water is dripping. And I wonder where does the liquid come from, until I finally peer into the bag and see that she had just bought some fresh fish from the market. Then when the train finally jerked to a stop, the man to my right is suddenly a couple of inches nearer to me.
Two more stations to go!
Just when I think that things cannot be anymore worse, I am proven wrong. Handphones start to ring as if it is nobody's business. I am treated to a wide variety of music of all genres. From Jay Chou, Westlife and Siti Nurhaliza to Richard Clayderman, P. Ramlee and Bollywood. Oh, not forgetting the homophonic 'Jingle Bell's. Then they talk as though they are in the comfort and privacy of their living rooms, speaking in maximum volume, in languages which will really contaminate my hearing. I know it is very rude to eavesdrop, Mummy has often taught me not to, but in this case, I really can't help overhearing the whole conversations. It is not as if I want to and would like to, but it just cannot be otherwise, of course unless I'm deaf, which I am not.
One more station to go!
The man in front of me starts to cough and the woman to his left starts to sneeze. I was taught to cover my mouth whenever I do so, but I guess not all Mums and Dads teach their kids to do so. Well, besides that, one of their hands is clutching their bags which I think must contain at least 10 bars of pure gold, and the other is holding onto the railing, clinging on for their dear lives, as though the train is going to go topsy-turvy anytime. Where is there a third hand to cover their mouths?
Next station, Hang Tuah.
Finally, I've reached my station. I just cannot wait to get out of this confinement, but not without putting up a last fight. As the doors open, I have to push my way through, rubbing against a thousand other torsos on the way, muttering a million 'excuse me's just to battle for whatever limited space that is left for me. At the same time, another sea of homo sapiens is gushing into the train.
Fresh air at last, and space, wonderfully precious space! I never know how precious they are previously.
Having to take the public transport every week day, I know what it means to be really close to someone. Especially during peak hours like 8am+ and 5pm+, you are forced into the close company of strangers, whether or not you like it, of course, unless you don't mind waiting for a longer period of time for the next train/ bus. Well, as for me, I have neither the luxury of time nor the patience.
The moment the doors slide open, the battle for space begins. Everyone tries to shove and push to secure a spot in the train, however small it may be. As long as they get both their feet beyond the open doors, other parts come in second. Hence, we have the hilarious situations when guys get their backpacks stuck in between the closed doors and the edges of clothing are seen between the doors. I try to be civilised and let others go first, after all, this is what we were taught in moral classes, but somehow, people just don't give way to civility. Those from the back start pushing if you don't make way, and deep inside, I realise that if I don't do the same, I will never get on the train.
Finally, I am in the train, and when the doors close, I realise that I am trapped in a small space with at least more than 50 other strangers. Claustrophobia sets in! Not only so, I find myself in close proximity to these people whom I hardly know. In fact, they are total strangers. Literally! I find my body being dangerously and uncomfortably close to them. Sometimes, our hands touch and, as though there is a current, both hands are drawn apart in a reflex, followed by a muttered apology, as if it is a great sin to be in contact with each other. How ironical that sounds, when you are surrounded by a sea of crowd!
Four more stations to go!
The longer period of time I spend in the train, the more conscious I am of the apparent odour coming from those around me. There are smells of Romance, Curious, Calvin Klein and Hugo. There are smells of mere body odour that makes me wonder when was the last time these people took a long good shower, or perhaps they fell into a drain prior to boarding the train. The mixture of odours turns the sweet smell to unbearably strong stench and the smell of sweat into... well, I shall not proceed.
Three more stations to go!
When the lady in front of me finally decides to remove her baggage from the seat next to her, for which I assume she bought a ticket since they occupy one whole seat or perhaps more, I seize the opportunity and force my bum into the limited space. After having done so, I begin to regret. I realise that the man to my right is eyeing me from top to toe and it really makes me feel awkward and uncomfortable. The woman to my left is carrying a plastic bag from which water is dripping. And I wonder where does the liquid come from, until I finally peer into the bag and see that she had just bought some fresh fish from the market. Then when the train finally jerked to a stop, the man to my right is suddenly a couple of inches nearer to me.
Two more stations to go!
Just when I think that things cannot be anymore worse, I am proven wrong. Handphones start to ring as if it is nobody's business. I am treated to a wide variety of music of all genres. From Jay Chou, Westlife and Siti Nurhaliza to Richard Clayderman, P. Ramlee and Bollywood. Oh, not forgetting the homophonic 'Jingle Bell's. Then they talk as though they are in the comfort and privacy of their living rooms, speaking in maximum volume, in languages which will really contaminate my hearing. I know it is very rude to eavesdrop, Mummy has often taught me not to, but in this case, I really can't help overhearing the whole conversations. It is not as if I want to and would like to, but it just cannot be otherwise, of course unless I'm deaf, which I am not.
One more station to go!
The man in front of me starts to cough and the woman to his left starts to sneeze. I was taught to cover my mouth whenever I do so, but I guess not all Mums and Dads teach their kids to do so. Well, besides that, one of their hands is clutching their bags which I think must contain at least 10 bars of pure gold, and the other is holding onto the railing, clinging on for their dear lives, as though the train is going to go topsy-turvy anytime. Where is there a third hand to cover their mouths?
Next station, Hang Tuah.
Finally, I've reached my station. I just cannot wait to get out of this confinement, but not without putting up a last fight. As the doors open, I have to push my way through, rubbing against a thousand other torsos on the way, muttering a million 'excuse me's just to battle for whatever limited space that is left for me. At the same time, another sea of homo sapiens is gushing into the train.
Fresh air at last, and space, wonderfully precious space! I never know how precious they are previously.
Monday, October 8, 2007
2/365
What a weekend!! Saturday morning, I had to wake up at 6am and go all the way to Subang Jaya to sit for my SAT. I reached there about 7am, checked out my seat and classroom and found myself sitting in front of Ian (as always, because of our names), and then went for breakfast at McD. What a lousy McD! The percolator, or something like that was not working and all that they could give us was Milo. We were fine with that, really, and we asked for iced Milo. Then they made us wait at least 15 minutes before the food arrive and it really annoys me since there was only 45 minutes left to the time of my exam. And when the 'iced Milo' finally came, it was Milo + ice in two different cups. Can't they understand simple English?
My SAT.... Well, that room was freezing cold and I was not allowed to switched seats as we were arranged in a certain order (which I really don't think this is the case, since no one led me to my seat). I was shivering all through the exam and can't even sit up properly. Just hope that it didn't affect me adversely..... The questions.... hmm... essay was fine, but I feel that the last paragraph I added in at the last minute was pretty lame and not very convincing. Anyway, it was not as bad as the reading section. There were so many big words!!! Goodness me! How was the paper over all? I really don't know. I've learnt not to place expectations on myself, as I have been disappointed a number of times previously. Just wait and see, I guess.... But the most extraordinarily pleasant thing was that Rodney actually remembered that I sat for my SAT on Saturday and he e-mailed to ask me how was it! How nice of him!
Then right after the test, after dropping Ian off at a bus station, we rushed back home to have our lunch, to shower and then rush down to Crowne Plaza Mutiara for the Friends Forever practice before our church 9th Anniversary Building Fund Raising Dinner. Even after all the rushing, we were more than an hour late. The jam... my goodness.... was just not perceivable! And then the second practice at 5pm was such a mess! People forgot their lines, forgot the dance steps, and was just lost on stage. Everyone started to feel the pressure and the stress and we just freaked out. Some even broke down and cried, including one who was the most unexpected. However, everything turned out well. In fact, it was VERY GOOD. Indeed, way beyond any one's expectations. Praise the Lord! The promise in 1 Peter 5:7 and Psalm 55:22 was such a comfort! Especially when doing His work for His glory, it is such a comfort to know that He is really the one who's bearing all the cares. And I've also come to realise how the tears of one man can bring about such great impact....
Then on Sunday, although there was no Friends Forever practice (yay!), I reached home only about 4pm because I attended Baby Dorothy's full moon party cum Joshua and Josiah's 6th birthday party. Baby Dorothy is such a beauty! So small and so fragile, yet so full of life.... Indeed, she is one of God's amazing creations. Really makes me marvel in awe at His greatness and superiority.
So, it has been two long days, exceptionally long days! And very tiring too! I went to college the next day (at 7.45am for CF committee meeting) feeling so tired and drained. I was literally dozing off in class! *oops!* And Miss Cumareson's voice in Literature class does not help at all.... However, it is a blessed assurance that when we come before Him, He will give us rest, as He has promised in Matthew 11:28. Very eventful 2/365!
My SAT.... Well, that room was freezing cold and I was not allowed to switched seats as we were arranged in a certain order (which I really don't think this is the case, since no one led me to my seat). I was shivering all through the exam and can't even sit up properly. Just hope that it didn't affect me adversely..... The questions.... hmm... essay was fine, but I feel that the last paragraph I added in at the last minute was pretty lame and not very convincing. Anyway, it was not as bad as the reading section. There were so many big words!!! Goodness me! How was the paper over all? I really don't know. I've learnt not to place expectations on myself, as I have been disappointed a number of times previously. Just wait and see, I guess.... But the most extraordinarily pleasant thing was that Rodney actually remembered that I sat for my SAT on Saturday and he e-mailed to ask me how was it! How nice of him!
Then right after the test, after dropping Ian off at a bus station, we rushed back home to have our lunch, to shower and then rush down to Crowne Plaza Mutiara for the Friends Forever practice before our church 9th Anniversary Building Fund Raising Dinner. Even after all the rushing, we were more than an hour late. The jam... my goodness.... was just not perceivable! And then the second practice at 5pm was such a mess! People forgot their lines, forgot the dance steps, and was just lost on stage. Everyone started to feel the pressure and the stress and we just freaked out. Some even broke down and cried, including one who was the most unexpected. However, everything turned out well. In fact, it was VERY GOOD. Indeed, way beyond any one's expectations. Praise the Lord! The promise in 1 Peter 5:7 and Psalm 55:22 was such a comfort! Especially when doing His work for His glory, it is such a comfort to know that He is really the one who's bearing all the cares. And I've also come to realise how the tears of one man can bring about such great impact....
Then on Sunday, although there was no Friends Forever practice (yay!), I reached home only about 4pm because I attended Baby Dorothy's full moon party cum Joshua and Josiah's 6th birthday party. Baby Dorothy is such a beauty! So small and so fragile, yet so full of life.... Indeed, she is one of God's amazing creations. Really makes me marvel in awe at His greatness and superiority.
So, it has been two long days, exceptionally long days! And very tiring too! I went to college the next day (at 7.45am for CF committee meeting) feeling so tired and drained. I was literally dozing off in class! *oops!* And Miss Cumareson's voice in Literature class does not help at all.... However, it is a blessed assurance that when we come before Him, He will give us rest, as He has promised in Matthew 11:28. Very eventful 2/365!
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
About Turn
Yesterday, as I turned on the radio while having lunch, it was playing Cat Steven's "Morning Has Broken". It is such a beautiful song, that I decided to seize this chance and just enjoy the music as it is, regardless of the memories it triggered. As I turned on the radio for some company while studying, again the same song was being played, and the most peculiar thing was that, this song was again brought to my attention when I checked my inbox the same night; my brother sent me a beautiful mail with this song playing in the background. Whenever I listen to this song, it never fails to trigger grief and sorrow within me for the person who sang this song-- Cat Stevens a.k.a Yusuf Islam.
For those of you who have not heard of him, Cat Stevens was an icon in the music industry back in the 70's or 80's. He sang many of the songs with which we are familiar today, among them are "Morning Has Broken" and "Father And Son", which is one of my favourites. However, some years back, at what was purportedly his last concert, he announced that he had converted to Islam and had changed his mane to Yusuf Islam. Since then, he has stepped out of the secular entertainment world. After the 911 incident, he was denied access into his own country because of his religion and has since become a prominent figure in the world of international relations, as he became an ambassador to reconcile the West and the Middle East.
"Morning Has Broken" is not an unfamiliar song in churches, at least not in mine. We sing it as one of the hymns, and one certainly cannot deny the beauty of the lyrics. It is so full of praise for the ultimate Creator who gave us life. It truly saddens me to think of what has become of the person who sang it so beautifully. He made an about turn, and turned his back on the one true God whom he so adored before. Did he not find fulfillment in Jesus Christ? Does Islam really fill the gap within every soul, and his, that longs to be filled with something from the divine? Or was his about turn a result of something else?
He was disappointed by the way he was treated by other Christians. They do not practise what they preach. At least so I heard. As to its authenticity, I cannot ascertain. But one thing I do know: there were people who were turned away while in search of the truth, because people who claimed to be Christians were not practising what they preach.
Hypocrisy, indeed.... one of the 'defects' in the church which Paul had highlighted in one of his letters. In fact, calling it a defect is an understatement. Defects can be easily mended, and minor defects will not even have a significant effect. Instead, they often go unnoticed. Hypocrisy is more like an epidemic, a deadly virus, like SARS or the Bird Flu; it spreads quickly, and affects not only those in close proximity, but its effects are extended even to those who are on the outside. How sad! Sad, but true!
Over time, we see how hypocrisy affects the church, we also recall times when we ourselves are affected and pissed off by the hypocrisy of others. Well, I myself have certainly experienced it. Yet, I do not think this issue has been effectively addressed. Christians are still living in their make-believe paradise, oblivious to the watching eyes of outsiders. We are often the target of close monitoring by the world. Why? Because we preach a much needed message of love and care, yet it is one that is incomprehensible to the rest of the world. So, they are looking at us for some substantial acts that truly substantiate what we preach. However, time and again, we have disappointed them.
I do not know what effect the story of Cat Stevens has on you, but it certainly makes me want to change the way I have been conducting myself, so that my life reflects the message of love that Christianity bears. We may pray for Cat Stevens and hope that he will make another about turn, but faith is accompanied with actions. The change that needs to take place is the change in our lives, the change in the definition we give to the word 'Christian'. I cannot bear to have another Cat Stevens a.k.a Yusuf Islam in the world. I have more than enough grief already. Besides that, we never know the extent of the effect Stevens' conversion has on the world at large, after all, he was an icon.
For those of you who have not heard of him, Cat Stevens was an icon in the music industry back in the 70's or 80's. He sang many of the songs with which we are familiar today, among them are "Morning Has Broken" and "Father And Son", which is one of my favourites. However, some years back, at what was purportedly his last concert, he announced that he had converted to Islam and had changed his mane to Yusuf Islam. Since then, he has stepped out of the secular entertainment world. After the 911 incident, he was denied access into his own country because of his religion and has since become a prominent figure in the world of international relations, as he became an ambassador to reconcile the West and the Middle East.
"Morning Has Broken" is not an unfamiliar song in churches, at least not in mine. We sing it as one of the hymns, and one certainly cannot deny the beauty of the lyrics. It is so full of praise for the ultimate Creator who gave us life. It truly saddens me to think of what has become of the person who sang it so beautifully. He made an about turn, and turned his back on the one true God whom he so adored before. Did he not find fulfillment in Jesus Christ? Does Islam really fill the gap within every soul, and his, that longs to be filled with something from the divine? Or was his about turn a result of something else?
He was disappointed by the way he was treated by other Christians. They do not practise what they preach. At least so I heard. As to its authenticity, I cannot ascertain. But one thing I do know: there were people who were turned away while in search of the truth, because people who claimed to be Christians were not practising what they preach.
Hypocrisy, indeed.... one of the 'defects' in the church which Paul had highlighted in one of his letters. In fact, calling it a defect is an understatement. Defects can be easily mended, and minor defects will not even have a significant effect. Instead, they often go unnoticed. Hypocrisy is more like an epidemic, a deadly virus, like SARS or the Bird Flu; it spreads quickly, and affects not only those in close proximity, but its effects are extended even to those who are on the outside. How sad! Sad, but true!
Over time, we see how hypocrisy affects the church, we also recall times when we ourselves are affected and pissed off by the hypocrisy of others. Well, I myself have certainly experienced it. Yet, I do not think this issue has been effectively addressed. Christians are still living in their make-believe paradise, oblivious to the watching eyes of outsiders. We are often the target of close monitoring by the world. Why? Because we preach a much needed message of love and care, yet it is one that is incomprehensible to the rest of the world. So, they are looking at us for some substantial acts that truly substantiate what we preach. However, time and again, we have disappointed them.
I do not know what effect the story of Cat Stevens has on you, but it certainly makes me want to change the way I have been conducting myself, so that my life reflects the message of love that Christianity bears. We may pray for Cat Stevens and hope that he will make another about turn, but faith is accompanied with actions. The change that needs to take place is the change in our lives, the change in the definition we give to the word 'Christian'. I cannot bear to have another Cat Stevens a.k.a Yusuf Islam in the world. I have more than enough grief already. Besides that, we never know the extent of the effect Stevens' conversion has on the world at large, after all, he was an icon.
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Chambers v Almighty
The 21st century has seen people of the world fighting for their rights. Vigilant movements to fight for basic human rights, rights of women, rights of children, and rights of the minority have risen everywhere on the face of the earth. This reflects a widespread awareness of the law and of the rights that the law has given to us. While it is good and right to know the law and vouchsafe your rights as was constituted, let's not carry it to the extreme.
Living in the 21st century, we are so used to hearing people say, "I will sue you", that in fact, it has become one of the most popular phrases of the century. Even children say it. Of course, Hollywood has never ceased to promote what the law can do for you. As a law student, of course, I am not spared from this widespread epidemic. When doing the problem questions, I have to think of ways and laws under which I can sue people. Interesting, but not as interesting as you think it is. As I have 5 hours of law every week, inevitably, I also begin to view my daily life from a legal perspective. I begin to take notice of rights and contracts in our daily lives that were breached. Let me assure you, this annoys my family a lot, and I mean A LOT!
On Wednesday, though, this caught my eye,
Living in the 21st century, we are so used to hearing people say, "I will sue you", that in fact, it has become one of the most popular phrases of the century. Even children say it. Of course, Hollywood has never ceased to promote what the law can do for you. As a law student, of course, I am not spared from this widespread epidemic. When doing the problem questions, I have to think of ways and laws under which I can sue people. Interesting, but not as interesting as you think it is. As I have 5 hours of law every week, inevitably, I also begin to view my daily life from a legal perspective. I begin to take notice of rights and contracts in our daily lives that were breached. Let me assure you, this annoys my family a lot, and I mean A LOT!
On Wednesday, though, this caught my eye,
"The defendant in a Nebraska state senator's lawsuit is accused of causing untold death and horror and threatening to cause more still. He can be sued in the state's Douglas County, the legislator claims, because He is everywhere."
- "Senator Sues God in Protest", The Star
Yes, he is trying to sue God. And the charge? "God has inspired fear and caused widespread death, destruction and terrorisation of millions upon millions of the Earth's inhabitants...... and has caused fearsome floods... horrendous hurricanes, terrifying tornadoes". He is seeking an injunction (a court order to prevent someone from doing something) against God. What can I say but 'bizarre' and 'absurd'.
As people of the 21st century, we are so engrossed with the power of the law, that we seem to have placed our security and our trust wholly on the law and our rights. The law is such an essential weapon for our lives, so much so that it does not merely function as a shield to safeguard our well being, but also as a weapon of attack for us to launch attacks at others, all in the name of 'human rights'. It has even elevated us to an assumed a disposition way beyond where the Creator of the heavens and the earth has placed us, so much so that we now attempt to rebuke our Creator.
I am indeed surprised that such an act of naivety was carried out by a lawmaker, one who was elected to govern the people most probably because of his capability. As I read of the news, I can't help but imagine my pet gold fish saying to me, "Hey! Keep your hands out of my goldfish bowl, or I'll sue you!" Sounds bizarre, isn't it? And we laugh at it. But this is exactly what our dear senator is doing. Doing such a thing, according to him, is to "make the point that anybody can file a lawsuit against anybody" under the law, but I think, it only shows us how interesting it can be when a senator turns himself into a clown. Indeed, he has made a laughing stock out of himself. What he did, to me, is like a child's play.
I wonder what happens if he does succeed in his action... What if the judge really grants him the injunction he is seeking? But, so what? Does anyone think that a mere injunction can regulate God's actions?
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Anyway
"God is great
But sometimes life ain't good
When I pray
It doesn't always turn out like I pray it should
But I do it anyway"
This is the chorus of a new song by Martina McBride. I like it so much. Things happen and we think that by praying, we always get what we want. But as this song says, things just don't turn out the way we want it to be sometimes. However, in all things, the best that you can do is to trust Him who has the best plan for your life. What a comfort!
"You can pour your soul out singing
A song you believe in
And tomorrow they'll forget you ever sing
Sing it anyway"
This last verse is also an encouragement for me. How many times have we done things that do not seem to be noticed and cherished by others? Countless! We stand up for something we believe in, and we are confronted with objections. Just as I encountered recently. Our confidence and our assurance may be swayed. However, what you really must do is to ascertain what you believe in is true, and HOLD on to your principle! It doesn't matter if no one else notices what you do, or disapproves of it, what matters is that it is pleasing to our Heavenly Father.
Now you see why Martina McBride never ceases to be one of my favourites!
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Who Am I?
Who am I?
I am a student.
I am pastor's daughter.
I am Mum's princess.
I am my brothers' sister.
I am a friend's friend.
I am a youth leader.
I am the CF president.
I am a worship leader.
I am a back-up singer.
I am a lover of God.
I am His handservant.
I am salt and light.
I am a 19-year-old who behaves like 25.
I am a high achiever.
I am a leader.
I am a role model.
I am a Christian.
I am the phlegmatic.
I am the dictator.
I am the perfectionist.
I am the lawyer.
I am the book worm.
I am the interpreter.
Who am I, exactly? I don't really know. Sometimes, I just want to be Dorcas, the regular 19-year-old. full stop.
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
To LOVE someone...
"I love him better than myself... I know it by this:
I pray every night that I may live after him;
because I would rather be miserable than that he should be:
that proves I love him better than myself."
- by Emily Brontë's Catherine Earnshaw in Wuthering Heights
Sunday, September 9, 2007
10 things
Lately with the funeral and all, I can't help being overcome by the notion of death. I can't help feeling how fragile our lives are and how uncertain tomorrow is. I may be here today, but I can't vouchsafe that I'll still be here tomorrow. In fact, I am not even sure I will be here the next second. Same goes to my loved ones; I do not know how long they will be with me, and this scares me. Of course, songs like "If Tomorrow Never Comes" and "Live Like You Were Dying" enhance this depressing notion. So, I decided to come up with this list:
10 things I wanna do if I have only 1 month to live:
- Fall in love
- Experience campus life in US
- Go bungee-jumping, ab-sailing and white water rafting
- Join MV Doulos
- Attend Passion Conference
- Take Dad to Disneyland in Florida
- Take Mum to Switzerland
- Make a will so that my books and my bears do not fall into the wrong hands
- Catch up with old friends
- Confess to my parents all the things that I've done behind their backs
These, of course, are in random order. I used to have a similar list that I made sometime back when I was in school. Comparing the previous one to this one, there are significant differences. Things that matter most to me last time has now become rather insignificant, and other things have taken their places. My priorities have changed.
Today's sermon in church was about setting priorities. It is really ironical that it is usually in circumstances as such- when we are contemplating the subject of death- that we actually begin to set our priorities right. Only in times like these when we truly see what matters most in this fragile life.
Hey, here's a challenge to make this list for yourself. List down ten things and you see what you cherish most in life. I can't wait to this on your blog!
Friday, September 7, 2007
Science vs Humanity
Can humanity be tested with a scientific experiment? One with a hypothesis, variables and finally brings you to a conclusion? interesting.... This is the question posted in the movie "The Forgotten", a movie that I'd watched in the cinema couple of years ago with some friends, and had recently watched it again on the TV with my family. Obviously, it is one of my favourites.
In the movie, the aliens abducted some kids and faked a plane crash to cover it up. They subsequently erased memories of the kids from every human mind. All these aim to prove their hypothesis that the bond between parents and children is dissolvable, just like any other molecular bond. All except one mother denied the existence of the children. The mother then went on an adventure to prove her memory, and finally found herself standing up against the alien to combat him face to face, while holding on to the memories of her son, defending them from being taken away by the alien. Of course, as with most movies, it ended with a happily-ever-after ending.
However, to me, this is more than just any movie. This movie has succeeded in magnifying the fact that humanity is far more superior than science. Humanity can never be tested nor be proven with scientific methods, neither can the human mind fully comprehend humanity using scientific reasoning. We may conceive the newest technology and invent robots that are symbols of our technological advancement, but we can never fully comprehend the gift of humanity and the human mind.
Humanity is the unique gift God has given to mankind, and this elevates us to a position of superiority over other creations. It is what distinguishes us from other living creatures. We feel and we think for ourselves, and with our reasoning, we decide what's good and what's not and then act accordingly. Humanity is the greatest gift ever given to mankind.
But as with all gifts, just as it can be given to us, in the same way, we can also lose it, either by our own account, or as a result of circumstances. It is time we check ourselves and see what have we been doing with this precious gift from up above. News of wars, bombings and suicide attacks have been adding colours to the newspapers. All these may seem far-fetched to people like you and I who are living in a supposingly peaceful country. However, we can certainly identify with the news of the toddler being killed and her body dumped in several places, the 12-year-old who brutally murdered his tuition teacher's young daughter and the parents who killed their own baby. Where is humanity? Sure sounds to me that we are gradually turning into emotionless beings, just like the beasts that consume their own young. How scary!
Maybe it is time we check and see what have we done to our gift of humanity. Have we chucked it in the closet and have not been using it for quite some time? Or even worse, have we forgotten where we have left it and can't seem to find it now that we need it? Cling on to the gift of humanity as it is the most precious gift to mankind that has made us who we are today. We would have been just like any other creature in the animal kingdom if not for this priceless gift.
"The Forgotten" ended with a scene that I really cherish. In a final attempt to make his experiment a success- that is for the woman to forget about her child- the alien forced his way into the mother's mind to rob her of memories of her son. He took from her the memory of when she first saw her son- in the operation theater where she gave birth to him and for the first time, looked into his face. He thought by erasing her first glimpse of her son, it will erase subsequent memories of him, but to his surprise, a mother's memory of her child does not begin in the labour room; it began when she first conceived a child, when it was a part of her in her being.
In the movie, the aliens abducted some kids and faked a plane crash to cover it up. They subsequently erased memories of the kids from every human mind. All these aim to prove their hypothesis that the bond between parents and children is dissolvable, just like any other molecular bond. All except one mother denied the existence of the children. The mother then went on an adventure to prove her memory, and finally found herself standing up against the alien to combat him face to face, while holding on to the memories of her son, defending them from being taken away by the alien. Of course, as with most movies, it ended with a happily-ever-after ending.
However, to me, this is more than just any movie. This movie has succeeded in magnifying the fact that humanity is far more superior than science. Humanity can never be tested nor be proven with scientific methods, neither can the human mind fully comprehend humanity using scientific reasoning. We may conceive the newest technology and invent robots that are symbols of our technological advancement, but we can never fully comprehend the gift of humanity and the human mind.
Humanity is the unique gift God has given to mankind, and this elevates us to a position of superiority over other creations. It is what distinguishes us from other living creatures. We feel and we think for ourselves, and with our reasoning, we decide what's good and what's not and then act accordingly. Humanity is the greatest gift ever given to mankind.
But as with all gifts, just as it can be given to us, in the same way, we can also lose it, either by our own account, or as a result of circumstances. It is time we check ourselves and see what have we been doing with this precious gift from up above. News of wars, bombings and suicide attacks have been adding colours to the newspapers. All these may seem far-fetched to people like you and I who are living in a supposingly peaceful country. However, we can certainly identify with the news of the toddler being killed and her body dumped in several places, the 12-year-old who brutally murdered his tuition teacher's young daughter and the parents who killed their own baby. Where is humanity? Sure sounds to me that we are gradually turning into emotionless beings, just like the beasts that consume their own young. How scary!
Maybe it is time we check and see what have we done to our gift of humanity. Have we chucked it in the closet and have not been using it for quite some time? Or even worse, have we forgotten where we have left it and can't seem to find it now that we need it? Cling on to the gift of humanity as it is the most precious gift to mankind that has made us who we are today. We would have been just like any other creature in the animal kingdom if not for this priceless gift.
"The Forgotten" ended with a scene that I really cherish. In a final attempt to make his experiment a success- that is for the woman to forget about her child- the alien forced his way into the mother's mind to rob her of memories of her son. He took from her the memory of when she first saw her son- in the operation theater where she gave birth to him and for the first time, looked into his face. He thought by erasing her first glimpse of her son, it will erase subsequent memories of him, but to his surprise, a mother's memory of her child does not begin in the labour room; it began when she first conceived a child, when it was a part of her in her being.
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
The Stopgap God
As I was on my way home the other day, I over heard the conversation of a couple of schoolgirls on the LRT. Initially it was about school (as with all students), then it gradually led to co-curriculum (what else is there in the life of a student?). They were discussing the activities they were involved in, and the conversation was something like this:
Girl 1: Hey, how's your Buddhist Society?
Girl 2: It's fine...
Girl 1: What do you guys do in the Buddhist Society? Is it fun? Do you like... meditate all the
time?
Girl 2: (chuckles) No! It is actually quite fun.
Then they rattled on and on about some chants which were supposed to be chanted on certain occasions for certain specific requests. After a while, she took out some cards from her bag, on which were printed the chants she was telling her friends.
Girl 1: Look, here are some of the chants... This is for... and this is for... (passes the cards
around)
Girl 3: Are they effective?
Girl 1 & 2: Yea... of course they are!
Upon hearing this, I started to pay even more attention to their conversation. What she said really sparked my interest. Effective? What does she mean by 'effective'? Well, I guess it means that when they say the 'prayers', the gods will answer at once and give them all that they ask for. When they ask for straight As, an 'effective' god will give them straight As and so on. In corporate terms, they want to see results.
Makes me wonder about us Christians. Are we like that sometimes? When we pray and ask God for something, we expect Him to answer us immediately, and not just give us any answer, but give us a "yes" to whatever we are asking for. How different are we, then, from the others? We often distinguish ourselves from others by saying that Christianity is not just a religion, it is a relationship with God. But I think it is time we consider how we treat this relationship.
Chinese especially, like to pray to gods (and ghosts too), to ask for health and wealth. We label a god as 'real' when we get what we asked for. If we don't get it, we say the god is 'ineffective'. How interesting..... Many after converting to Christianity, still carry this mindset along. We pray when we are facing a problem, asking God to provide a solution. We want to see the result when our prayer is being answered. When the answer is not the one we are expecting, we question God, or when He is silent, we start doubting His existence. What difference is there to a cork used to stop the hole in a barrel? What happened to all the talk on 'faith'?
It is time we start to consider how we are treating our God. Is this a relationship or is this a religion like any other? I am sure when we ask our parents for anything, we do not expect them to always answer us in the way we want them to. Yes, it is desirable to get the answer we want, but it is not always the case. They may say no because they have a better answer for us, or they may just tell us to wait. It is also the case with God.
And mind you people, praying to God is not a stopgap measure for your problems. I have seen my friend putting a picture of her god on the table while sitting for an exam. It does not help you get straight As, dear. No matter of what religion you are, such an act of desperation in a time of desperation is not cherished. Praying, just like chit-chatting, is an acticvity of pleasure for me. It is more of an outlet for me to pour out my heart's deepest worries than as a remedy to my problems.
So, dear friends, do not treat God like a plaster to stop the bleeding or to take Him as a stopgap measure for your problems. Treat Him as a friend to whom you can pour out your heart and your soul.
Girl 1: Hey, how's your Buddhist Society?
Girl 2: It's fine...
Girl 1: What do you guys do in the Buddhist Society? Is it fun? Do you like... meditate all the
time?
Girl 2: (chuckles) No! It is actually quite fun.
Then they rattled on and on about some chants which were supposed to be chanted on certain occasions for certain specific requests. After a while, she took out some cards from her bag, on which were printed the chants she was telling her friends.
Girl 1: Look, here are some of the chants... This is for... and this is for... (passes the cards
around)
Girl 3: Are they effective?
Girl 1 & 2: Yea... of course they are!
Upon hearing this, I started to pay even more attention to their conversation. What she said really sparked my interest. Effective? What does she mean by 'effective'? Well, I guess it means that when they say the 'prayers', the gods will answer at once and give them all that they ask for. When they ask for straight As, an 'effective' god will give them straight As and so on. In corporate terms, they want to see results.
Makes me wonder about us Christians. Are we like that sometimes? When we pray and ask God for something, we expect Him to answer us immediately, and not just give us any answer, but give us a "yes" to whatever we are asking for. How different are we, then, from the others? We often distinguish ourselves from others by saying that Christianity is not just a religion, it is a relationship with God. But I think it is time we consider how we treat this relationship.
Chinese especially, like to pray to gods (and ghosts too), to ask for health and wealth. We label a god as 'real' when we get what we asked for. If we don't get it, we say the god is 'ineffective'. How interesting..... Many after converting to Christianity, still carry this mindset along. We pray when we are facing a problem, asking God to provide a solution. We want to see the result when our prayer is being answered. When the answer is not the one we are expecting, we question God, or when He is silent, we start doubting His existence. What difference is there to a cork used to stop the hole in a barrel? What happened to all the talk on 'faith'?
It is time we start to consider how we are treating our God. Is this a relationship or is this a religion like any other? I am sure when we ask our parents for anything, we do not expect them to always answer us in the way we want them to. Yes, it is desirable to get the answer we want, but it is not always the case. They may say no because they have a better answer for us, or they may just tell us to wait. It is also the case with God.
And mind you people, praying to God is not a stopgap measure for your problems. I have seen my friend putting a picture of her god on the table while sitting for an exam. It does not help you get straight As, dear. No matter of what religion you are, such an act of desperation in a time of desperation is not cherished. Praying, just like chit-chatting, is an acticvity of pleasure for me. It is more of an outlet for me to pour out my heart's deepest worries than as a remedy to my problems.
So, dear friends, do not treat God like a plaster to stop the bleeding or to take Him as a stopgap measure for your problems. Treat Him as a friend to whom you can pour out your heart and your soul.
Tuesday, September 4, 2007
CSI Craze
MONDAY = CSI
If you do not know, CSI stands for 'Crime Scene Investigation'. It is a hit series on criminal investigation, showing on AXN. As I do not have Astro, it means catching an older season on NTV 7 every Monday. There's CSI: New York at 8pm, CSI: Miami at 10.45pm and CSI: Las Vegas at 11.45pm. Hence, the above equation. The television set is mine on Monday evenings. Unfortunately, I usually miss the 8pm one as my dinner time is around 8pm.
CSI has become like an addiction for me. It is a must watch, rain or shine, day or night, exam or no exam. Criminal investigation series are nothing new as there are many other such series. However, I think what capture the interest of CSI fans like me are the scandals surrounding the cases (people just love scandals, don't they?) and the usually stunning revelation at the end of the episode (suspense!).
Another aspect that has captured my attention is the portrayal of the characters, not the criminals (they are all the same: either inhumane, insane, or indifferent) but the investigators. The way they interact with each other and with the criminals sure provide a good ground for character analysis. And each team of CSI has its own unique characteristics, making each one just as unique and interesting.
Fellow CSI-kaki, Hon Whi, once asked me who's my favorite: Mac (NY), Horatio (Miami) or Grissom (Las Vegas), and my answer was Grissom. But right now, I think I want to make an about turn and pick Horatio instead. The more I watch the series, the more I fall in love with him.
Mac is just regular. Nothing much about him. Neither good nor bad, lukewarm. Grissom on the other hand, is absolutely good. His goodness is a universal truth. A father figure, nice, kind, friendly. He will be the one who counsels his subordinate and be the first to advocate their promotion is they are deem to be suitable. In fact, he is just too good to be real, so much so that I find it difficult to identify him as a real person. Well, I must commend the producer though, for creating such a down-to-earth guy as Grissom.
As for my dear Horatio (and his trademark shades), he is such a mystery. His cool outward appearance sure disguises his warm heart well. At times he seems to be an emotionless robot who keeps strictly to procedure. But when it comes to his loved ones, or even the victims' family, his heart just melts for them and seeks to help them wherever possible. Of course when it comes to his own brother, he is willing to go as far as to bend the rules for his sake. Now that's human!
Besides being a scientific movie, Grissom's team is actually pretty poetic. There are some quotes from the series that I found really meaningful. When a dead girl lied on the coroner's table, he said this,
"Beauty is skin deep. We're all the same inside."
And as Greg (the new kid in Grissom's team) attended his first post mortem, he said this about life as he saw the body being cut open,
"That's all we really are. It's what we do with it that counts."
Well, CSI is more than just a criminal investigation series. It is indeed an insightful drama. Probably this is why it caught my interest and and the interest of so many others. A wonderful production indeed.
Freed... at last!
Praise the Lord! The Korean hostages were freed, at last! Praise the Lord for their safe return. Above all, praise the Lord for their faith that did not waver! Of course, in the midst of all the joy, our friends in the politics never fail to make their presence felt. This time, by criticising the payment of the ransom of $70 million for the release of the hostages.
Let's make things clear a little. The Korean did not admit the payment of the ransom. So, whether there was a ransom or not, that remains a good question. Yes, it was implied by the spokesman's reply, but implications are always vague. And if they did resolve to paying the ransom, my dear know-it-all friends, please suggest a better way out. Well, of course, if there had been another way out, the 19 innocent men and women would not have to be held up for almost a month.
Having direct negotiations with the Talibans will only encourage them to carry out more kidnappings in the future. But is there another way? since releasing the captured Talibans is a definite NO, NO. Well, there is the 'greater good' principle. We must sacrifice a few lives for the greater good. It's just 19 lives to deter further kidnappings by the Talibans. It is a good cause to die for. I am sure this is being echoed in the hearts of our dear know-it-all friends. It was just not said, as it will not be politically favourable for them.
Yes, they may just be 19 lives. 19 civilians whose existence you and I did not even realise until the reports of the kidnaps were published. We have approximately 7 billion people on the face of the earth, and 19 is none the less. Well, if you have not realised, these 19 men and women each have a father and a mother who prayed for their safe return every single second since the news of their capture reached their ears. These 19 men and women each have children who anxiously waited for them to read to them bedtime stories. These 19 men and women each have friends who truly cared about their safety. These 19 men and women are not just numbers to these people. They are individuals who are loved. How can they just be left to die in the hands of the Talibans?
I wonder will it be the same if the ones held hostage were not the Koreans but George Bush and Tony Blair. I wonder if those same voices will be saying the same thing, about 'dying for a noble cause' and 'the principle of the greater good'. After all, it will be an even budget sacrifice: two lives to end the activities of the Talibans. World peace, man! Or will the reaction be otherwise? Will those voices start calling for a release of the Taliban prisoners? Perhaps they may be willing to pay an even greater ransom for the release of these two. What about all the talks on 'encouraging further kidnappings'?
Of course, their action will then be justified by saying that these men are 'very important people'. The world needs them. If we don't bail them out, it will cause a worldwide chaos. Will it? Or will it bring world peace instead?
It sure makes me wonder why two different groups of people sharing the same fate triggers off different reactions from the same people. What puts one above the other, when both are just humans with parents who brought them into this world? As much as people care for the big shots who are always in the limelight, those Koreans, though mere civilians they may be, also have loved ones who care deeply for them.
God created us just the same, may we be a president of a nation or a regular man on the street, and I do not think that He has empowered any of us to place any one person above another in status. In His eyes, we are all His children, and He loves us just the same. I am sure He too would like us to do the same.
So, you smart alecs out there, stop criticising the South Korean government for negotiating with the Talibans for the release of the hostages. They did that despite the anticipated criticism because they love the 19 men and women. The 19 is not just a number to them. They are God's creation, His precious creation.
Let's make things clear a little. The Korean did not admit the payment of the ransom. So, whether there was a ransom or not, that remains a good question. Yes, it was implied by the spokesman's reply, but implications are always vague. And if they did resolve to paying the ransom, my dear know-it-all friends, please suggest a better way out. Well, of course, if there had been another way out, the 19 innocent men and women would not have to be held up for almost a month.
Having direct negotiations with the Talibans will only encourage them to carry out more kidnappings in the future. But is there another way? since releasing the captured Talibans is a definite NO, NO. Well, there is the 'greater good' principle. We must sacrifice a few lives for the greater good. It's just 19 lives to deter further kidnappings by the Talibans. It is a good cause to die for. I am sure this is being echoed in the hearts of our dear know-it-all friends. It was just not said, as it will not be politically favourable for them.
Yes, they may just be 19 lives. 19 civilians whose existence you and I did not even realise until the reports of the kidnaps were published. We have approximately 7 billion people on the face of the earth, and 19 is none the less. Well, if you have not realised, these 19 men and women each have a father and a mother who prayed for their safe return every single second since the news of their capture reached their ears. These 19 men and women each have children who anxiously waited for them to read to them bedtime stories. These 19 men and women each have friends who truly cared about their safety. These 19 men and women are not just numbers to these people. They are individuals who are loved. How can they just be left to die in the hands of the Talibans?
I wonder will it be the same if the ones held hostage were not the Koreans but George Bush and Tony Blair. I wonder if those same voices will be saying the same thing, about 'dying for a noble cause' and 'the principle of the greater good'. After all, it will be an even budget sacrifice: two lives to end the activities of the Talibans. World peace, man! Or will the reaction be otherwise? Will those voices start calling for a release of the Taliban prisoners? Perhaps they may be willing to pay an even greater ransom for the release of these two. What about all the talks on 'encouraging further kidnappings'?
Of course, their action will then be justified by saying that these men are 'very important people'. The world needs them. If we don't bail them out, it will cause a worldwide chaos. Will it? Or will it bring world peace instead?
It sure makes me wonder why two different groups of people sharing the same fate triggers off different reactions from the same people. What puts one above the other, when both are just humans with parents who brought them into this world? As much as people care for the big shots who are always in the limelight, those Koreans, though mere civilians they may be, also have loved ones who care deeply for them.
God created us just the same, may we be a president of a nation or a regular man on the street, and I do not think that He has empowered any of us to place any one person above another in status. In His eyes, we are all His children, and He loves us just the same. I am sure He too would like us to do the same.
So, you smart alecs out there, stop criticising the South Korean government for negotiating with the Talibans for the release of the hostages. They did that despite the anticipated criticism because they love the 19 men and women. The 19 is not just a number to them. They are God's creation, His precious creation.
Thursday, August 30, 2007
Turning 50
Malaysia has just turned 50! That's a big number.... 50 years is equivalent to half a century, and that sure sounds big! As with all middle-age men, when you are of a certain age, it is only natural that you take a look at life (and I mean a serious look!)-- of the past and of the future. As for Malaysia as a nation, it is time for us to ask ourselves whether we are truly "MERDEKA!" or are we "merdeka?".
During the pre-National Day craze (as I would like to call it), the newspapers were constantly filled with news of the Jalur Gemilang being flown here and there, and the Jalur Gemilang being made up of this and that. Despite all these, the government is still pretty upset that motorists are not 'passionately' flying the Jalur Gemilang. Frankly, I find this very..... amusing (as in "funny" amusing). So what if you fly the national flag and so what if you don't? Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against flying the national flag. No one can deny that it is a patriotic gesture.
However, I do not think that not flying the flag or flying less flags means that you are not patriotic. In the same way, flying the national flag right outside your house or on your vehicle does not mean that you are very patriotic. Even foreign fishermen who encroached into our waters flew the flag in the hope of misleading the authorities. At times, our nation is so engrossed with having the biggest and longest, tallest and widest of things, that we overlooked things that really matter to us as a nation. So what if we have the largest Jalur Gemilang made up of rice? Wouldn't the rice be more beneficial if it were donated to the poor and needy?
I believe that true love for the country comes from your heart. When you cease to magnify the faults of the local government in your own eyes and in the eyes of your foreign counterparts, that's being patriotic. When you identify the weak links in the systems of the country and try to do your best to mitigate and remedy the situation, that's being patriotic. When you internalise the needs and burdens of the country and intercede on her behalf, and ask God for His mercy and His provision, that's being patriotic.
But you see, some things in this country are just.... plain gone case. That's nothing much we can do to make things better. Ah, I see! So that's why so many people, Christians and Chinese especially, opted to leave the country and migrate to another country, say Australia, Singapore and Canada, thinking that life over there will be much better. After all, the grass on the other side is always greener. In answering this question, we must first ask ourselves the question regarding our identity. We always say we are Chinese or Indian. Hello!! Chinese come from China and Indians come from India. Some claiming to be Chinese have never even set foot on Chinese soil!
Frankly, for people like myself, a Chinese who has never even gotten a single glimpse of China, really have no place to be called home. I can't claim to be a Chinese Chinese (some can't even speak Chinese, really), and migrating to Australia or Canada does not make me more of an Australian or a Canadian. However, deep within me (and all of us, I'm sure) I know who I really am-- a Malaysian. At least, if I remain in Malaysia, I can call myself a Malaysian, and that's who I am.
As Hon Whi said yesterday, all of us are searching for a perfect government, a perfect country, where there is hundred percent equality, where everybody is being treated equally, without a trace of partiality. Unfortunately, my friends, there is no such thing as perfection, and equality is a fantasy, as long as you are on earth. You can traverse the breadth and length of the earth in search for perfection, but it will be as futile as Shi Huang Ti's quest for the Fountain of Youth.
In Malaysia, a certain people group is being recognised as having certain special rights, and these rights are being provided for in the Constitution. It is a taboo. No one questions it, and no one is allowed to question it. Those who do so may probably share the same fate as Wee Meng Chee. How then can we do anything to improve the situation, when we are not even allowed to question and ask for equal rights to be rendered? The only way is for us to leave the country. Yes, it is true that there is nothing we can do to obtain equal rights. It is just impossible. However, things can improve. The core to national unity, is not for all to have equal rights, but for all to be content with all that they have. Well, at least we have basic human rights. At least we have the right to preserve our culture and traditions. At least we have the right to practice our own faith. At least we have the freedom to worship our God freely. Isn't that enough?
In Phillipians 4:12, Paul says "I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want." How can we harp on minor imperfections in the country, like a less than ideal education system, a less than perfect government and a less than desirable constitution, when Paul was content with all that he had in a jail cell, where there was no education, no democratic government and no human rights at all? It has been 50 years now. Let us be truly merdeka, not only as a nation, but also in our mindset.
During the pre-National Day craze (as I would like to call it), the newspapers were constantly filled with news of the Jalur Gemilang being flown here and there, and the Jalur Gemilang being made up of this and that. Despite all these, the government is still pretty upset that motorists are not 'passionately' flying the Jalur Gemilang. Frankly, I find this very..... amusing (as in "funny" amusing). So what if you fly the national flag and so what if you don't? Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against flying the national flag. No one can deny that it is a patriotic gesture.
However, I do not think that not flying the flag or flying less flags means that you are not patriotic. In the same way, flying the national flag right outside your house or on your vehicle does not mean that you are very patriotic. Even foreign fishermen who encroached into our waters flew the flag in the hope of misleading the authorities. At times, our nation is so engrossed with having the biggest and longest, tallest and widest of things, that we overlooked things that really matter to us as a nation. So what if we have the largest Jalur Gemilang made up of rice? Wouldn't the rice be more beneficial if it were donated to the poor and needy?
I believe that true love for the country comes from your heart. When you cease to magnify the faults of the local government in your own eyes and in the eyes of your foreign counterparts, that's being patriotic. When you identify the weak links in the systems of the country and try to do your best to mitigate and remedy the situation, that's being patriotic. When you internalise the needs and burdens of the country and intercede on her behalf, and ask God for His mercy and His provision, that's being patriotic.
But you see, some things in this country are just.... plain gone case. That's nothing much we can do to make things better. Ah, I see! So that's why so many people, Christians and Chinese especially, opted to leave the country and migrate to another country, say Australia, Singapore and Canada, thinking that life over there will be much better. After all, the grass on the other side is always greener. In answering this question, we must first ask ourselves the question regarding our identity. We always say we are Chinese or Indian. Hello!! Chinese come from China and Indians come from India. Some claiming to be Chinese have never even set foot on Chinese soil!
Frankly, for people like myself, a Chinese who has never even gotten a single glimpse of China, really have no place to be called home. I can't claim to be a Chinese Chinese (some can't even speak Chinese, really), and migrating to Australia or Canada does not make me more of an Australian or a Canadian. However, deep within me (and all of us, I'm sure) I know who I really am-- a Malaysian. At least, if I remain in Malaysia, I can call myself a Malaysian, and that's who I am.
As Hon Whi said yesterday, all of us are searching for a perfect government, a perfect country, where there is hundred percent equality, where everybody is being treated equally, without a trace of partiality. Unfortunately, my friends, there is no such thing as perfection, and equality is a fantasy, as long as you are on earth. You can traverse the breadth and length of the earth in search for perfection, but it will be as futile as Shi Huang Ti's quest for the Fountain of Youth.
In Malaysia, a certain people group is being recognised as having certain special rights, and these rights are being provided for in the Constitution. It is a taboo. No one questions it, and no one is allowed to question it. Those who do so may probably share the same fate as Wee Meng Chee. How then can we do anything to improve the situation, when we are not even allowed to question and ask for equal rights to be rendered? The only way is for us to leave the country. Yes, it is true that there is nothing we can do to obtain equal rights. It is just impossible. However, things can improve. The core to national unity, is not for all to have equal rights, but for all to be content with all that they have. Well, at least we have basic human rights. At least we have the right to preserve our culture and traditions. At least we have the right to practice our own faith. At least we have the freedom to worship our God freely. Isn't that enough?
In Phillipians 4:12, Paul says "I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want." How can we harp on minor imperfections in the country, like a less than ideal education system, a less than perfect government and a less than desirable constitution, when Paul was content with all that he had in a jail cell, where there was no education, no democratic government and no human rights at all? It has been 50 years now. Let us be truly merdeka, not only as a nation, but also in our mindset.
Friday, August 24, 2007
Viva la Italia!
My parents have gone to Port Dickson for a staff retreat and my brothers and I are home alone! interesting... Whenever anyone hears of this news, the first thing they ask is, "How about your meals?" No sweat, fellas, we can cope. We are going Italian! Actually, we decided to indulge ourselves in 'fine Italian dining'. Where, you may ask... Well, I will disclose the venue later. The menu for the day is as follows:
appetizer
Chicken and Mushroom soup
Toast with butter
main course
Spaghetti with Bolognese mushroom sauce plus extra cheese
dessert
***
drinks
Green and Red Apple Juice
It seemed like a pretty nice menu to me, although the dessert was missing and the food was served in topsy-turvy order. Main course came first, then the appetizer, followed by the drinks. Oh, by the way, if I have yet to tell you where we had Italian food, it was at 30, Jalan Pandan Indah 16, Pandan Indah. Yup, at my home! I cooked the soup, Samuel made the main course with my counsel, made the toast and the juices. Joseph, of course, did the washing and cleaning up.
It was fun and we spent more than an hour eating and preparing the food and messing the kitchen up. *oops!* I wish I could share with you guys our culinary masterpieces, but unfortunately it didn't occur to me to take any picture of them. Well, we didn't plan to have such a scrumptious meal. The initial plan was just to have spaghetti, but it turned out to be so extensive. wow!
Actually, the thing I enjoyed most was not the food. Frankly, if a culinary chef were to rate the food, he will probably give them a 3 on a scale of ten, that is if he even wants to try the food. It is actually the time we spent together; just the three of us, catching up on each other and bonding. Just putting aside all the differences and coming together and laugh and play (we unconsciously spent a lot of time quarrelling, you know). Moments like these are really rare. So, it makes my day all the more special and wonderful.This is the most precious gift I obtained today. Of course, the Italian dining is a complement.
Thursday, August 23, 2007
some amazing quotes
Here are some quotes from Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë which I found amazing. It will be even more amazing if not for the fact that the speakers are married, but not to each other...
"...for every thought she spends on Linton, she spends a thousand on me!"
"If he loved with all the powers of his puny being, he couldn't love as much in eighty years as I could in a day."
"...the sea could be as readily contained in that horse trough, as her whole affection be monopolised by him!"
- by Emily Brontë's Heathcliff in Wuthering Heights
"My great miseries in this world has been Heathcliff's miseries, and I watched and felt each from the beginning: my great thought in living is himself. If all else perished, and he remained, I should still continue to be; and if all else remained, and he were annihilated, the universe would turn to a mighty stranger: I should not seem a part of it. My love for Linton is like the foliage in the woods: time will change it, I'm well aware, as winter changes the trees. My love for Heathcliff resembles the eternal rocks beneath: a source for little visible delight, but necessary. Nelly, I AM Heathcliff! He's always, always in my mind: not as a pleasure, any more than I am always a pleasure to myself, but as my own being."
- by Emily Brontë's Catherine Earnshaw in Wuthering Heights
Monday, August 20, 2007
Unforgivable!
The name 'Namewee' and the title 'Negaraku Ku' are not strangers to us. Recently, they stole the limelight from the preparations for our 50th Independence Day when they repeatedly appeared on the front page of the newspapers, before the limelight was again stolen by the fatal bus accident that took 22 lives.
The controversial video clip "came under fire for mocking the national anthem and making statements many found offensive". It purportedly "[created] anti government sentiments and [fanned] racism". To sum it all up, it simply meant that it had shaken the fundamentals of our society. Oh, wow! 50 years now and the fundamentals of our society are so easily shaken? I for one did not realise that our fundamentals were so fragile, so much so that a six-minute rap created by a 24-year-old can have such significant impact on our society that should, by now, be well-established.
Confession time: I watched the video clip on YouTube, but I do not think that my opinion of it bears much significance. Hence, I shall not elaborate on it right here. However, when a minister was asked why this clip was considered to be a mockery of the national anthem, he said that it was because the national anthem should be sung in a respectful manner and should not be sung as a rap. Besides that, according to the minister, the word 'Ku Ku' in 'Negaraku Ku' can also mean 'cuckoo' and therefore is a form of insult.
Frankly, I find the explanation hilarious. National anthems can't be a rap? What if ten years from now the young people of today who will eventually be the leaders of tomorrow decide to have a rap song as the national anthem? Why should their creativity be stunted? The genre of the music does not affect the message that the song bears, does it? 'Ku Ku' = 'cuckoo'? I thought there is a word in the Kamus Dewan with the same spelling and pronunciation. Does it mean 'cuckoo' too?
Don't get me wrong. I am not saying that what Wee Meng Chee did was right and acceptable. In fact, it was legally wrong and unjustifiable. The lyrics of his song had indeed encroached on issues which are considered to be 'sensitive issues' in the constitution. As Malaysians, we have a duty to uphold the constitution and to honour it, whether or not we agree to its contents. This is because our forefathers had agreed to it, and therefore, it is only appropriate that we give them due respect.
However, I still think that various parties have unnecessarily kicked up a fuss over this issue. He "[made] statements many found offensive". Please define 'many'! The whole population of Malaysia? I don't think so. And what about those who found it offensive and yet felt that it was unnecessary to kick up such a fuss over the immature actions of a 24-year-old?
Well, I was personally offended by the remarks of the parliamentarians who insulted not only the female population in the country, but also the womenfolk in their own families. Yet they were let off the hook with a mere apology. Oh well, they didn't really mean what they said. Hmm... I sure am not creative enough to come out with any other interpretation of their words, except to take it at face value.
It sure brings us to question why the inconsiderate remarks of people who are supposed to be leaders of the country can be so easily forgiven, when the immature actions of a 24-year-old cannot be forgiven and must be brought to court.
Well, it "[fanned] racism". This is not acceptable in a multi-racial country like Malaysia. Ah, I see. What about politicians who fuelled racial sentiments for their own political gain? They can be let off the hook but not a 24-year-old who did not even know the trouble he got himself into?
You know, Mummy always says that if someone says something untrue about you, and you know that it is untrue, the best way to shut them up is to turn a deaf ear to them. Well, of course, if what is being said is true, it is a different story altogether. Crows don't like looking into the mirror because they don't like what they see.
Ironically, the exact opposite is just being carried out. With all the publicity the mass media is giving to the video clip, more attention is drawn to it. Curiosity is sparked and people like me, who would not have come across the video if not for the reports in the papers, watched the video clip on YouTube out of sheer curiosity. Now, even school children are singing the song and they even know the lyrics by heart. So much for discouraging mockery of the national anthem!
Such an act is not prevented by merely bringing the young man in question to court as a warning to all. Instead, respect for the country should be instilled by teaching them to discern between right and wrong. Penalising the current culprit is just a stopgap measure. Young people do not have to be told what is right and what is not by being spoon-fed certain stereotype mindsets and shutting them up whenever they are perceived to be wrong. Certain values need to be instilled so that they can discern for themselves between right and wrong. Then in that case, it does not matter what is being posted on the web, as it will not be able to sway the principles and values that are deeply inculcated and ingrained within the spirit of a true Malaysian.
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